This Sunday I will taking my 5 year old daughter to Punk Island 2011. Part of the Make Music New York Festival held on Tuesday the 21st, Punk Island will be a collection of 70 + acts spread across 8 stages for 6 hours on Governor's Island. Since Governor's Island isn't open to the public on Tuesdays, the organizers of Make Music New York decided to hold Punk Island on Sunday instead.
A couple of weeks ago I started to describe the event to Caelyn. I told her it was a bunch of loud, noisy punk bands. That was as far as I got before she interrupted me by yelling, "I wanna go! Can we go?" As my plan was to ask her if she was interested in going, I told her yes. She was upset however, when I told her she would not be allowed in the pit. I have to draw the line somewhere. =-)
Many of my Facebook posts revolve around Caelyn and her reaction to music. This is, in part, because I find it amusing. There is something intrinsically funny to me about a 5 year old running around in circles screaming Ramones at the top of her lungs when they come on or having to stop everything and dance every time something loud, hard and fast is played.
Music is a major part of Caelyn's life. Her love for it is very strong. I, of course, am the enabler or pusher in this case if you will. I have something playing almost all the time.
Music has been a strong love of mine for as long as I can remember. I still have the first album (actually it was a cassette) I ever bought with my own money. It was Joan Jett and the Blackhearts' I love Rock n Roll. I bought it from a place called Rat Records in the Village section of Houston.
It is a great thrill of mine to see Caelyn have the same passion and love for music that I do. I particularly like that her favorite type of music is as she puts it, the loud, noisy kind.
Ironically it was my wife, who is much more James Taylor than Johhny Rotten, who noticed our daughter's love of loud music. She noticed that as a baby, Caelyn would be in a better mood whenever guitar heavy songs were played. When she pointed this out to me, I pulled out countless cds, some mine, some Kerry's and played them to watch Caelyn's reactions. Sure enough, guitar driven music was what she responded to.
I have already mentioned in another post how The Distillers helped her through colic. We would use White Stripes to calm her late at night when she woke up coughing and confused. There was nothing like 'Blue Orchid" to bring her around when she would start to lose it during those late night hours.
As she has gotten older, she still prefers the noise. Particularly, played live. It could be a full scale, large stage show or just some band set up on a sidewalk and she will want to see them. She loves live music.
Last summer we took her to many smaller concerts around NYC. Mostly they were kid friendly rock bands that actually did rock. Then over Labor Day Weekend we took to RevGen 2010.
RevGen is a Christian music festival in southern NJ consisting of mostly metal, hard rock and hardcore bands. We figured it would be a good venue to see how she did with tens of thousands of people around. Plus there was some pretty good bands playing. She had a great time though my shoulders were a bit sore from all the time she spent on them. Click here to see video of Caelyn jammin to Fireflight's Desperate.
So this Sunday should be fun. She won't know any of the bands. She doesn't need to. All she needs to know is she will be seeing music performed all day long and she is happy and excited.
Friday, June 17, 2011
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Not Your Typical Girl
My daughter is not your average 5 year old. Perhaps, average isn't the right word. There really is no such thing as an average 5 year old.
At that age they are so full of potential and enthusiasm it is hard to call them average. Watch them closely and you can catch glimpses of who they could become. Their potential is almost limitless but you can see see their future demons in there also. It is an amazing age so average doesn't fit.
I hesitate to use the word normal. It's kind of a loaded word and it means different things to different people. So let's just say my daughter is not your typical 5 year old.
This is not surprising. She has always been a little different from kids her own age. There is just something in her personality.
I remember the ultrasound where we learned Caelyn was a girl. Her legs were tightly closed. The technician pushed at her from a variety of angles trying to get her to move. Each attempt was met with resistance. It took so long, I thought the technician would just give up. I was about ready to myself. It was then Caelyn finally moved. We saw this little foot on the monitor grow until it took up almost the entire screen. The technician jumped a little, then laughed. “She just kicked me,” she told us.
When Caelyn was too young to even crawl, she had a bout of colic. It was what I would call good colic, if there is such a thing. Rather than occurring at night, it would start around 4 pm. and end around 8 pm. It was frustrating but better than her screaming through the night.
One afternoon, after trying everything I could think of to calm her down, I just gave up. I went over to the computer and cranked The Distillers while I held Caelyn in my lap. For those who are not familiar with The Distillers, the simple description is they are a very noisy punk band. Upon hearing the music, Caelyn immediately calmed and fell asleep. It became our routine until the colic ended.
From before the age of two she loved The Ramones. For almost two years, it was the only thing she would listen to in the car without getting upset. At age three she asked me why they sounded different when I put on the Brain Drain CD. This was their first release after Dee Dee, their primary songwriter had left the band. Even at that early age, she noticed the slight change in musical style.
Her preferred shoe of choice, Converse Chuck Taylor High Tops. One pink, One purple. She has been wearing them that way for years and is genuinely confused when people remark that her shoes don't match.
This year, her Easter basket contained a maze. Caelyn picked her own starting point far from the end and made it correctly from it to the finish never once going near the beginning. My wife commented this describes our daughter perfectly.
Now going to kindergarten, her difference is obvious. She is the only one at school carrying a Ramones book bag rather than a backpack. While she does like Hello Kitty and princesses, her favorite shirts have Speed Racer, The Avengers, The Ramones, Green Day and Darth Vader on them.
She may be the only one in her school (certainly the only one in her grade) to see American Idiot on Broadway. Granted, that was my idea, but her excitement at the show was unbelievable. The second Billy Joe Armstrong entered the stage, she couldn't stop jumping up and down. She danced and sang along with the songs much to the delight of the people around us.
A couple of weeks after the show, Caelyn's Aunt Melina met Billy Joe Armstrong and mentioned to him her niece really enjoyed American Idiot. Caelyn was stunned and thrilled to find out the singer from Green Day knew she liked his show.
Caelyn loves to draw, paint, tell stories, put on shows and just about anything artistic and creative. She is always asking what this song means or what was meant when they sang this lyric. She also wants explanations for why characters in stories, movies and tv shows do the things they do.
Recently she started writing songs. Seriously. She started writing lyrics using a phonics based system of writing since she can't read very well yet. Either that or she tells the lyrics to me so I can write them for her. Many times she will then go over to the piano and bang out a rhythm for the lyrics. They are simple and short with a lot of repetition but they are clearly songs. The subjects are generally things going on at school or about God. Sometimes they are a take on a song she knows.
It is unlikely, however, she will ever be a sports star. She takes dance and Taekwon-do. She does well with them but put her in front of a soccer ball or a glove on her hand and while she will give it all she's got, not much has developed there. She has yet to ride a bike because she thinks peddling is too difficult.
Long before I ever considered having children, I jokingly remarked that if I ever did have a child I would raise it to be a boil on the ass of society. While I don't really want that, I don't want a typical child either and I never have.
Perhaps it is because I am not normal. My wife will be the first to tell you this. After ten plus years of marriage and being together years before that, she still is amazed at how I see and interpret the things around me. She often remarks how she forgets I don't think like normal people do. I take this as a compliment even when it is not meant to be.
There is a debate about nature vs nurture as to how a child will turn out. In the case of my daughter, it doesn't matter as I am a stay at home dad and she definitely has my nature.
This has me worried for Caelyn's teenage years though and even for what they now call the tween years. She is not typical and the world can be cruel to those who don't fit in their box. It starts early in life but really hits hard in high school.
While I had an abundance of friendly acquaintances in high school, people I had known since elementary school that I got along with, I only had a couple of truly close friends. I was blessed to have them in my life. I was also fortunate to have a wonderful girlfriend my senior year.
Those three, they know who they are, helped me in ways they never knew just by their mere presence in my life and even though I am not the best at keeping in touch, I still love them dearly. I hope and pray my daughter has the same good fortune I did and finds people like them.
She will have a tough time as she gets older and starts to realize she is different. Sadly, there will be plenty of her peers more than willing to point it out to her as well.
My wife and I will be there to support her and hopefully she will never lose her individuality. I hope and pray we instill in her the confidence to be herself no matter what. I hope she always stays that girl in the womb, kicking at those who try to get her to move when she is not ready. And I hope she has the will to fight and kick and claw to keep herself and never lose it to those that will try to stomp out that individuality which makes her so extraordinary. For she is just that, extraordinary.
At that age they are so full of potential and enthusiasm it is hard to call them average. Watch them closely and you can catch glimpses of who they could become. Their potential is almost limitless but you can see see their future demons in there also. It is an amazing age so average doesn't fit.
I hesitate to use the word normal. It's kind of a loaded word and it means different things to different people. So let's just say my daughter is not your typical 5 year old.
This is not surprising. She has always been a little different from kids her own age. There is just something in her personality.
I remember the ultrasound where we learned Caelyn was a girl. Her legs were tightly closed. The technician pushed at her from a variety of angles trying to get her to move. Each attempt was met with resistance. It took so long, I thought the technician would just give up. I was about ready to myself. It was then Caelyn finally moved. We saw this little foot on the monitor grow until it took up almost the entire screen. The technician jumped a little, then laughed. “She just kicked me,” she told us.
When Caelyn was too young to even crawl, she had a bout of colic. It was what I would call good colic, if there is such a thing. Rather than occurring at night, it would start around 4 pm. and end around 8 pm. It was frustrating but better than her screaming through the night.
One afternoon, after trying everything I could think of to calm her down, I just gave up. I went over to the computer and cranked The Distillers while I held Caelyn in my lap. For those who are not familiar with The Distillers, the simple description is they are a very noisy punk band. Upon hearing the music, Caelyn immediately calmed and fell asleep. It became our routine until the colic ended.
From before the age of two she loved The Ramones. For almost two years, it was the only thing she would listen to in the car without getting upset. At age three she asked me why they sounded different when I put on the Brain Drain CD. This was their first release after Dee Dee, their primary songwriter had left the band. Even at that early age, she noticed the slight change in musical style.
Her preferred shoe of choice, Converse Chuck Taylor High Tops. One pink, One purple. She has been wearing them that way for years and is genuinely confused when people remark that her shoes don't match.
This year, her Easter basket contained a maze. Caelyn picked her own starting point far from the end and made it correctly from it to the finish never once going near the beginning. My wife commented this describes our daughter perfectly.
Now going to kindergarten, her difference is obvious. She is the only one at school carrying a Ramones book bag rather than a backpack. While she does like Hello Kitty and princesses, her favorite shirts have Speed Racer, The Avengers, The Ramones, Green Day and Darth Vader on them.
She may be the only one in her school (certainly the only one in her grade) to see American Idiot on Broadway. Granted, that was my idea, but her excitement at the show was unbelievable. The second Billy Joe Armstrong entered the stage, she couldn't stop jumping up and down. She danced and sang along with the songs much to the delight of the people around us.
A couple of weeks after the show, Caelyn's Aunt Melina met Billy Joe Armstrong and mentioned to him her niece really enjoyed American Idiot. Caelyn was stunned and thrilled to find out the singer from Green Day knew she liked his show.
Caelyn loves to draw, paint, tell stories, put on shows and just about anything artistic and creative. She is always asking what this song means or what was meant when they sang this lyric. She also wants explanations for why characters in stories, movies and tv shows do the things they do.
Recently she started writing songs. Seriously. She started writing lyrics using a phonics based system of writing since she can't read very well yet. Either that or she tells the lyrics to me so I can write them for her. Many times she will then go over to the piano and bang out a rhythm for the lyrics. They are simple and short with a lot of repetition but they are clearly songs. The subjects are generally things going on at school or about God. Sometimes they are a take on a song she knows.
It is unlikely, however, she will ever be a sports star. She takes dance and Taekwon-do. She does well with them but put her in front of a soccer ball or a glove on her hand and while she will give it all she's got, not much has developed there. She has yet to ride a bike because she thinks peddling is too difficult.
Long before I ever considered having children, I jokingly remarked that if I ever did have a child I would raise it to be a boil on the ass of society. While I don't really want that, I don't want a typical child either and I never have.
Perhaps it is because I am not normal. My wife will be the first to tell you this. After ten plus years of marriage and being together years before that, she still is amazed at how I see and interpret the things around me. She often remarks how she forgets I don't think like normal people do. I take this as a compliment even when it is not meant to be.
There is a debate about nature vs nurture as to how a child will turn out. In the case of my daughter, it doesn't matter as I am a stay at home dad and she definitely has my nature.
This has me worried for Caelyn's teenage years though and even for what they now call the tween years. She is not typical and the world can be cruel to those who don't fit in their box. It starts early in life but really hits hard in high school.
While I had an abundance of friendly acquaintances in high school, people I had known since elementary school that I got along with, I only had a couple of truly close friends. I was blessed to have them in my life. I was also fortunate to have a wonderful girlfriend my senior year.
Those three, they know who they are, helped me in ways they never knew just by their mere presence in my life and even though I am not the best at keeping in touch, I still love them dearly. I hope and pray my daughter has the same good fortune I did and finds people like them.
She will have a tough time as she gets older and starts to realize she is different. Sadly, there will be plenty of her peers more than willing to point it out to her as well.
My wife and I will be there to support her and hopefully she will never lose her individuality. I hope and pray we instill in her the confidence to be herself no matter what. I hope she always stays that girl in the womb, kicking at those who try to get her to move when she is not ready. And I hope she has the will to fight and kick and claw to keep herself and never lose it to those that will try to stomp out that individuality which makes her so extraordinary. For she is just that, extraordinary.
Monday, June 13, 2011
Ramblings About The End of School and Summer
In less than two weeks our daughter will finish her first year of school. She will no longer be a kindergartner. She will be moving into the first grade.
Caelyn's kindergarten graduation is set for next Wednesday with the last day of school next Thursday. It's funny. Before I had a child in school, I found the idea of all the little graduation celebrations amusing. I didn't really see them as having much of a point. Not anymore. They are significant, at least for a kindergartner.
I hear the transition from kindergarten to first grade is one of the toughest. For the first time they have to sit in desks rather than around tables. The teaching styles are different and the work is harder. It may be only one grade difference but it is two different worlds.
As is often the case with time, this school year has seemed to both fly and crawl by simultaneously. It feels as if it were only yesterday I was holding Caelyn's hand, walking her to class on her first day of "real" school.
That day was hard on me. I was proud but sad. It was her first significant step into a bigger world that I would not always be a part of. There would be influences I would have no control over and friends I would barely know. It would be a world that was hers. Sure, I would be a part of it, but it would be hers and I would be the visitor.
Fortunately, that world has been a good one. She has been blessed with wonderful teachers and classmates. She has made some really good friends and has learned a lot.
Now with summer coming, the onus will be on me to make sure the relationships she has forged through this school year continue.
One of the saddest things it seems to me is to see the relationships built up over the course of a school year disappear, or at least go on hiatus, during the summer. I know from my own experience that is tough on a kid. You go from seeing your friends almost every day to not seeing them at all very abruptly.
It's no one's fault really. Time doesn't stop and the day to day activities of life keep coming so before you know it, summer is over and your kid hasn't seen their friends for two months. It happens to us adults all the time.
So there will need to be play dates. Hopefully, a lot of play dates. I need to make sure of that. There is also Caelyn's birthday at the beginning of August to plan. Hopefully, many of her classmates will be in town for that.
This monkey will need to do some dancing this summer to keep the kids entertained. And I hope to have my kids and their friends dancing along with me.
Caelyn's kindergarten graduation is set for next Wednesday with the last day of school next Thursday. It's funny. Before I had a child in school, I found the idea of all the little graduation celebrations amusing. I didn't really see them as having much of a point. Not anymore. They are significant, at least for a kindergartner.
I hear the transition from kindergarten to first grade is one of the toughest. For the first time they have to sit in desks rather than around tables. The teaching styles are different and the work is harder. It may be only one grade difference but it is two different worlds.
As is often the case with time, this school year has seemed to both fly and crawl by simultaneously. It feels as if it were only yesterday I was holding Caelyn's hand, walking her to class on her first day of "real" school.
That day was hard on me. I was proud but sad. It was her first significant step into a bigger world that I would not always be a part of. There would be influences I would have no control over and friends I would barely know. It would be a world that was hers. Sure, I would be a part of it, but it would be hers and I would be the visitor.
Fortunately, that world has been a good one. She has been blessed with wonderful teachers and classmates. She has made some really good friends and has learned a lot.
Now with summer coming, the onus will be on me to make sure the relationships she has forged through this school year continue.
One of the saddest things it seems to me is to see the relationships built up over the course of a school year disappear, or at least go on hiatus, during the summer. I know from my own experience that is tough on a kid. You go from seeing your friends almost every day to not seeing them at all very abruptly.
It's no one's fault really. Time doesn't stop and the day to day activities of life keep coming so before you know it, summer is over and your kid hasn't seen their friends for two months. It happens to us adults all the time.
So there will need to be play dates. Hopefully, a lot of play dates. I need to make sure of that. There is also Caelyn's birthday at the beginning of August to plan. Hopefully, many of her classmates will be in town for that.
This monkey will need to do some dancing this summer to keep the kids entertained. And I hope to have my kids and their friends dancing along with me.
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