Today started like any other. Maybe I woke up a little earlier than most but I woke up well so that was OK. I got out of bed, ate breakfast in front of the t.v. and then I got dressed.
Shortly after getting dressed is when the day went wrong, horribly wrong.
The man came into the room. He was bigger and faster than me and so much stronger. I fought hard but really never had a chance. Before I knew exactly what was going on, he drug me out of my house and into the cold. He forced me into the back of a car where he used shackles to keep me immobilized. This was not good.
He drove for a while never once showing any emotion or interest in the cries coming from behind him. He just drove.
Finally we arrived at a house. I noticed nothing that stood out about it as I tried to get my bearings and formulate a plan of action.
He whipped open the door next to me and effortlessly took off the shackles. As he drug me from the car toward the back door of the house, I should have yelled and tried to get away but my mind couldn't process what was happening. How could this be? Why was he doing this? Was it really only half an hour ago that I was safe and warm in my home blissfully unaware of the dark turn this day would take.
We entered the house and he drug me down a hallway where a woman sat calmly awaiting my arrival. She was attractive and in another situation I would have been happy to meet her but there was something unsettling about her. It didn't take me long to figure out that behind the pretty exterior was the heart of a sadist. I don't like to think about what she did to me but it was unpleasant and when she was done, it was all I could do to hold back the screams.
Finally she led my captor and I to another room. The room was a bit smaller than the first one. The lights were very bright. There were a couple of chairs, some sort of table and a counter but not much else. My captor forced me into the chair nearest the door. That was when I heard the screams.
The were horrible. Loud, high pitched piercing screams came to me from down the hallway. I didn't know what was being done to create those screams, I just hoped that whatever it was would not happen to me.
I was left alone with my captor. How long for, I don't know. It could have been minutes or hours but it seemed like an eternity. I thought about running but there was no where to go and no where to hide. So I sat quietly listening to the screams and saving my strength for the fight to come.
I didn't know what they had planned for me but I was not going down without a fight. I would make them pay for taking me from my home.
Finally a man walked in. He spoke kindly with my captor but I could see the sadism in his eyes. I was struck cold with fear. The man ordered my captor to strip me down to my underwear. He then forced me down on the table. I fought as hard as I could but my captor was too strong. He held me still as the sadist shined bright lights in my eyes and pushed painful pointed objects in my ears and mouth. I was helpless. There was nothing I could do so I settled for yelling every nasty thing I could think of at them. Finally, the man left and I was once again alone with my captor.
I was given back my clothes but not allowed to leave. Eventually, the sadistic woman from earlier returned carrying the biggest needle I had ever seen. I realized in horror that she intended it for me. My captor held me down as she jammed the needle in my leg. I howled in agony.
Over my cries of pain, I could hear my captor thank the nurse as she left. After her departure, I was allowed to leave. As my captor, my father, led me down the hall, I asked him if I could get a lollipop.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Portrait of an Artist as a Young Girl
She stared down intently at the paper before she started. Watching her, it looked as if the paper was talking to her. Finally, she started to work. She put some words here. She drew some pictures there. The birthday card started to come together. When she finished she wasn't quite satisfied. Something was missing.
She left and returned with some more paper and proceeded to make a pop up door to cover the picture on the front. Then, it was finished. The birthday card was ready to be presented to her friend later in the day.
My wife and I have often spoke about how creative our daughter is. She loves to draw and paint. She loves to write songs and perform. She loves to make up stories. Basically, if it involves creativity, she is interested.
However, as I watched Caelyn create the birthday card, it became clear to me that my daughter was an artist. Creating art (whether it be a picture, story or song) is not just something she does for fun. It is part of who she is. I don't think she could stop creating if she wanted to. It is in her nature.
One Sunday morning as we were getting ready to go to church, I heard Caelyn in the kitchen. She was writing a song she wanted to sing for our friend who is the church music director. She would sing a line. Pause. Sing it a little differently. Pause. This pattern would continue until she was satisfied with the line. Only then would she write it down. This continued line by line until she was comfortable with the song in it's entirety.
The other day at a restaurant, Caelyn was distraught that they were low on crayons and she only received two colors. She worked on a picture for a while and finally quit. A little upset, she looked over at me and explained she couldn't get the picture she wanted because she didn't have the colors she needed.
Caelyn is also an avid consumer of artistic endeavors of all types whether they be music, movies, TV, books or paintings. She shocked me one day while watching a show on t.v. She noticed a painting in the background. "Is that a Jackson Pollock?" she asked. A closer look by me and I had to admit, if it wasn't, it certainly looked like one.
She is constantly looking for an explanation as to why the characters in the books she reads or shows she watches do the things they do. When it comes to music, she wants an explanation of what the song means. Not content with that, she will ask what the singer meant by using specific words.
And of course there is the live music that she consumes as if obsessed. It doesn't matter if it is a crowd of forty thousand or 4, she wants to see it. She asks almost daily if she can see this band or that band when they come through.
She gets noticed at these shows too. Multiple times I have been approached by people at shows with ties to a rock camp for girls in Brooklyn. At a recent show at the Knitting Factory, Caelyn and I were hanging out with an all female band named The Coathangers when a woman gave me the number of a another woman who teaches girls to play rock music. The instructor in question has her own studio in Greenpoint and plays in a band with Kathleen Hanna from Bikini Kill.
It is amazing to watch the reaction of the female musicians to Caelyn when she is at their shows. They see something in her. They spend time with her talking about music and they don't talk down to her when they do. They encourage her to play even one time pointing to the Knitting Factory stage and saying they expect to see her up their in 10 years.
I don't know where her interests will lie in 10 years or further along the road. One thing I am certain of though is for her to be happy, she must create. I hope and pray she never tries to bury that creativity for it is truly a gift.
She left and returned with some more paper and proceeded to make a pop up door to cover the picture on the front. Then, it was finished. The birthday card was ready to be presented to her friend later in the day.
My wife and I have often spoke about how creative our daughter is. She loves to draw and paint. She loves to write songs and perform. She loves to make up stories. Basically, if it involves creativity, she is interested.
However, as I watched Caelyn create the birthday card, it became clear to me that my daughter was an artist. Creating art (whether it be a picture, story or song) is not just something she does for fun. It is part of who she is. I don't think she could stop creating if she wanted to. It is in her nature.
One Sunday morning as we were getting ready to go to church, I heard Caelyn in the kitchen. She was writing a song she wanted to sing for our friend who is the church music director. She would sing a line. Pause. Sing it a little differently. Pause. This pattern would continue until she was satisfied with the line. Only then would she write it down. This continued line by line until she was comfortable with the song in it's entirety.
The other day at a restaurant, Caelyn was distraught that they were low on crayons and she only received two colors. She worked on a picture for a while and finally quit. A little upset, she looked over at me and explained she couldn't get the picture she wanted because she didn't have the colors she needed.
Caelyn is also an avid consumer of artistic endeavors of all types whether they be music, movies, TV, books or paintings. She shocked me one day while watching a show on t.v. She noticed a painting in the background. "Is that a Jackson Pollock?" she asked. A closer look by me and I had to admit, if it wasn't, it certainly looked like one.
She is constantly looking for an explanation as to why the characters in the books she reads or shows she watches do the things they do. When it comes to music, she wants an explanation of what the song means. Not content with that, she will ask what the singer meant by using specific words.
And of course there is the live music that she consumes as if obsessed. It doesn't matter if it is a crowd of forty thousand or 4, she wants to see it. She asks almost daily if she can see this band or that band when they come through.
She gets noticed at these shows too. Multiple times I have been approached by people at shows with ties to a rock camp for girls in Brooklyn. At a recent show at the Knitting Factory, Caelyn and I were hanging out with an all female band named The Coathangers when a woman gave me the number of a another woman who teaches girls to play rock music. The instructor in question has her own studio in Greenpoint and plays in a band with Kathleen Hanna from Bikini Kill.
It is amazing to watch the reaction of the female musicians to Caelyn when she is at their shows. They see something in her. They spend time with her talking about music and they don't talk down to her when they do. They encourage her to play even one time pointing to the Knitting Factory stage and saying they expect to see her up their in 10 years.
I don't know where her interests will lie in 10 years or further along the road. One thing I am certain of though is for her to be happy, she must create. I hope and pray she never tries to bury that creativity for it is truly a gift.
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Me and Irene
Having grown up in Houston, I am not unfamiliar with hurricanes and tropical storms. I can still vividly remember category 3 Alicia that hit us when I was 13. It was an amazing and awe inspiring sight. We watched the massive storm through the large plate glass window in the living room. We went outside as the eye passed over us and felt the amazing calm inside of it. Then it was back inside for the rest of the storm.
People on our side of the street lost power for days. Interestingly enough, our neighbors across the street never did but their phones went out. Our phones never stopped working.
For close to a week, there would be extension cords running across the street up and down the block so people on our side of the street could keep the refrigerators running. Our neighbors would come over to use the phone.
It was with memories like these that I went about preparing for Hurricane Irene as she made her way up the east coast. She too was supposed to be a category 3 and I remembered full well the damage one of those could do.
However, while I was nervous, I wasn't scared. We are far enough inland that we don't have to worry about storm surges. There are no rivers around to overflow their banks but we do have trees, very large trees and we have skylights.
With there being nothing I could do about the trees or the skylights, my thoughts turned to our basement. While I have no proof of it, I believe there is an underground river that runs under our home. As a result, when we get water in the basement, it comes up though the floor. And when the ground is saturated, it can get pretty bad, pretty quick.
My plan was to stay up throughout the night to monitor the water pumps we have down there. For most of the night, one pump was able to hold the water at bay. Then around 5 a.m. it started getting bad.
Water was running in so quickly that even with both pumps going they were unable to bring the water level down. They held it steady for a while then slowly the water began to creep up. I prayed the power would not go out. If we lost power, it was over. Our water heater and our boiler would both end up in the rising water.
Fortunately, the lights stayed on and the water level rose only as high as the bottom of the water heater when Irene finally left. A half of an inch more and it would have taken water.
As I watched the news coverage late Saturday morning, I could hear the water pumps still pushing out the water. I saw pictures of homes and cars washed away. I heard stories of people who were killed. I saw the water covered streets and I knew I was fortunate.
We never lost power. None of our trees fell over. Our home and more importantly, our family was safe. I was tired. I had been up all night when all I wanted was to get some sleep but what I thought about was how blessed I was to have the health and strength to stay up all night.
It was a long, rough and sometimes nerve wracking night but we are very fortunate. So many others are not.
People on our side of the street lost power for days. Interestingly enough, our neighbors across the street never did but their phones went out. Our phones never stopped working.
For close to a week, there would be extension cords running across the street up and down the block so people on our side of the street could keep the refrigerators running. Our neighbors would come over to use the phone.
It was with memories like these that I went about preparing for Hurricane Irene as she made her way up the east coast. She too was supposed to be a category 3 and I remembered full well the damage one of those could do.
However, while I was nervous, I wasn't scared. We are far enough inland that we don't have to worry about storm surges. There are no rivers around to overflow their banks but we do have trees, very large trees and we have skylights.
With there being nothing I could do about the trees or the skylights, my thoughts turned to our basement. While I have no proof of it, I believe there is an underground river that runs under our home. As a result, when we get water in the basement, it comes up though the floor. And when the ground is saturated, it can get pretty bad, pretty quick.
My plan was to stay up throughout the night to monitor the water pumps we have down there. For most of the night, one pump was able to hold the water at bay. Then around 5 a.m. it started getting bad.
Water was running in so quickly that even with both pumps going they were unable to bring the water level down. They held it steady for a while then slowly the water began to creep up. I prayed the power would not go out. If we lost power, it was over. Our water heater and our boiler would both end up in the rising water.
Fortunately, the lights stayed on and the water level rose only as high as the bottom of the water heater when Irene finally left. A half of an inch more and it would have taken water.
As I watched the news coverage late Saturday morning, I could hear the water pumps still pushing out the water. I saw pictures of homes and cars washed away. I heard stories of people who were killed. I saw the water covered streets and I knew I was fortunate.
We never lost power. None of our trees fell over. Our home and more importantly, our family was safe. I was tired. I had been up all night when all I wanted was to get some sleep but what I thought about was how blessed I was to have the health and strength to stay up all night.
It was a long, rough and sometimes nerve wracking night but we are very fortunate. So many others are not.
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Playing at Being an Only Child
This week my daughter is in Washington D.C. with her Grammy, Grampa, Aunt Melina and cousin Kali. She left on Sunday and is not due back until tomorrow. This is quite a trip for her. It is the longest she has ever been away from her mother and I.
It is also the longest our two kids have ever been apart. So far Caleb is making the most of it.
He adores his big sister. There will be no one more excited about her return than him, but I think Caleb is enjoying playing at being an only child this week. He has the house to himself. He has full access to all the toys even the Barbies and princesses. And he has mommy and daddy without having to compete with his boisterous older sister.
All this has added up to a much less volatile child. In a previous post I wrote about how difficult and destructive my son can be. I attributed it to his age. This week has me wondering how much of it is his age and how much of it is trying to compete with his sister for attention.
Don't get me wrong, he is still a two year old boy and time out is a daily occurrence but there is a lot more down time for him. He is using the time he would normally be pulling his sister's hair to play with his cars.
And of course his sister is not here to antagonize him. If he picks up a Barbie, it's not the one his sister absolutely had to have. She does have a way of pushing his buttons and vice versa.
Normally there is a lot of activity going on around here. Caelyn is usually bounding around the house and Caleb wants to be a part of it. Or Caelyn needs to be taken to school, or camp, or another class of some sort. It's all quite hectic. This leaves Caleb in constant motion and never in charge of his own schedule.
But for now, without his sister, he has the run of the house leaving him more relaxed than usual. Yesterday he took the first nap he has taken without just passing out on the floor in a long time.
Soon though, his sister will return and I expect the volatility will as well. But at least now I know that some of it is an attempt to get attention and maybe, just maybe, that will help me bring him back to a calmer state.
It is also the longest our two kids have ever been apart. So far Caleb is making the most of it.
He adores his big sister. There will be no one more excited about her return than him, but I think Caleb is enjoying playing at being an only child this week. He has the house to himself. He has full access to all the toys even the Barbies and princesses. And he has mommy and daddy without having to compete with his boisterous older sister.
All this has added up to a much less volatile child. In a previous post I wrote about how difficult and destructive my son can be. I attributed it to his age. This week has me wondering how much of it is his age and how much of it is trying to compete with his sister for attention.
Don't get me wrong, he is still a two year old boy and time out is a daily occurrence but there is a lot more down time for him. He is using the time he would normally be pulling his sister's hair to play with his cars.
And of course his sister is not here to antagonize him. If he picks up a Barbie, it's not the one his sister absolutely had to have. She does have a way of pushing his buttons and vice versa.
Normally there is a lot of activity going on around here. Caelyn is usually bounding around the house and Caleb wants to be a part of it. Or Caelyn needs to be taken to school, or camp, or another class of some sort. It's all quite hectic. This leaves Caleb in constant motion and never in charge of his own schedule.
But for now, without his sister, he has the run of the house leaving him more relaxed than usual. Yesterday he took the first nap he has taken without just passing out on the floor in a long time.
Soon though, his sister will return and I expect the volatility will as well. But at least now I know that some of it is an attempt to get attention and maybe, just maybe, that will help me bring him back to a calmer state.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
The Story I Was Told
As best as I can figure, I was in the car driving my son to the playground when it happened. The earthquake yesterday that is. I felt nothing as I drove along listening to my son get more and more excited as he figured out where I was driving to.
Shortly after our arrival at the playground I received a text from my wife telling me her building had been evacuated due to a possible earthquake but no one knew for sure. There is a minor fault line under NYC and we occasionally will get a small tremor so I thought nothing of it. My only reply to my wife was to ask if she was coming home early.
A few minutes after this I received a text from my sister-in-law Melina telling me they were all safe but their building had been evacuated. This one got my attention. You see, my six year old daughter was with Melina along with my niece and my wife's parents. It's one thing to get a message from my wife about a building evacuation in Manhattan (a not uncommon occurrence) and another thing entirely to find out my daughter had just been through an earthquake.
I wasn't concerned for her safety. I already knew they were OK. I was however, very interested in what had happened and what specifically had gone on around my daughter and niece. So I pulled up the information about the earthquake on my phone and read over it while my son played on the playground.
Later, when we got back home, I gave Melina a call to learn their story. Here it is pieced together to the best of my ability from conversations with Melina, my niece Kali and my daughter Caelyn.
Caelyn, Kali, Melina, Grammy and Grampa were in the Natural History Museum of the Smithsonian looking at the earthquake display. Melina pointed out the fault line running under California. Caelyn asked her if there were any fault lines in New Jersey. Melina told her there was not.
So there can never be an earthquake here then, asked Caelyn. No, there can never be an earthquake here, Melina assured her. They then went down to the basement to eat lunch.
Never say never.
As they were eating lunch, everything began to shake and small debris fell from the ceiling. Some people started screaming. Melina, Grammy and Grampa collected the kids and headed for the doors as the building was evacuated. Caelyn told me she started to cry though Melina said she didn't really. She just got close.
It was a chaotic situation on the street as everyone was being evacuated and no one had anywhere to go. Eventually, they all made their was back to the hotel. Caelyn, thinking earthquakes were a common occurrence in D.C. declared she would never come back.
As I spoke to the girls later that day, they informed me the worst part was that because the museum was evacuated, they didn't get to go to the gift shop.
Shortly after our arrival at the playground I received a text from my wife telling me her building had been evacuated due to a possible earthquake but no one knew for sure. There is a minor fault line under NYC and we occasionally will get a small tremor so I thought nothing of it. My only reply to my wife was to ask if she was coming home early.
A few minutes after this I received a text from my sister-in-law Melina telling me they were all safe but their building had been evacuated. This one got my attention. You see, my six year old daughter was with Melina along with my niece and my wife's parents. It's one thing to get a message from my wife about a building evacuation in Manhattan (a not uncommon occurrence) and another thing entirely to find out my daughter had just been through an earthquake.
I wasn't concerned for her safety. I already knew they were OK. I was however, very interested in what had happened and what specifically had gone on around my daughter and niece. So I pulled up the information about the earthquake on my phone and read over it while my son played on the playground.
Later, when we got back home, I gave Melina a call to learn their story. Here it is pieced together to the best of my ability from conversations with Melina, my niece Kali and my daughter Caelyn.
Caelyn, Kali, Melina, Grammy and Grampa were in the Natural History Museum of the Smithsonian looking at the earthquake display. Melina pointed out the fault line running under California. Caelyn asked her if there were any fault lines in New Jersey. Melina told her there was not.
So there can never be an earthquake here then, asked Caelyn. No, there can never be an earthquake here, Melina assured her. They then went down to the basement to eat lunch.
Never say never.
As they were eating lunch, everything began to shake and small debris fell from the ceiling. Some people started screaming. Melina, Grammy and Grampa collected the kids and headed for the doors as the building was evacuated. Caelyn told me she started to cry though Melina said she didn't really. She just got close.
It was a chaotic situation on the street as everyone was being evacuated and no one had anywhere to go. Eventually, they all made their was back to the hotel. Caelyn, thinking earthquakes were a common occurrence in D.C. declared she would never come back.
As I spoke to the girls later that day, they informed me the worst part was that because the museum was evacuated, they didn't get to go to the gift shop.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
In a Warped State of Mind
Earlier today I took the kids with me to Guitar Center to pick up a new stand that hopefully, my son won't be able to destroy. While there my five year old daughter got upset with me for not buying her a new guitar that she fell in love with. This has me thinking about her love of music and our trip to the Warped Tour almost two weeks ago in Scranton, PA.
I am probably considered to old to be attending punk and metal music festivals but it was OK because between me and Caelyn, our average age was twenty two and a half.
While I didn't see everyone there, I do believe she was the youngest one attending. I did see a handful of kids in the nine and ten year old range but no one came close to being as young and as small as Caelyn was.
I have to admit, I was a little nervous that maybe I had pushed my daughter a little too far this time. She was excited to go. For weeks she had been demanding this band or that band be put on "the list" of bands she wanted to see as I played music for her. So I wasn't worried about her enjoying the music. That wasn't even an issue.
I was worried because this event would be far larger, louder, hotter, more crowded, and rougher than anything she has been to before. And she is only five. Spending ten hours in the sun surrounded by sea of people can make anyone cranky, much less someone who hasn't even been to first grade.
As it turns out, my fears were totally without basis. Much like Punk Island a month or so ago, Caelyn was perfectly at ease with the noise and chaos. More than that, she thrived in it. The only conflict we had was when I wouldn't bring to the edge of a particularly rough mosh pit. She saw no reason for there to be anyone between us and it. I did and had to explain to her that I kept a couple of people between us and the pit because her getting kicked in the head would hurt.
There is no kiddie section at the Warped Tour. There are no bounce houses or areas geared toward small children. It's music, merchandise and food. Those are your options. And we hit all of those in abundance.
In no particular order we saw all or part of the sets of the following bands: Pour Habit, Set Your Goals, Woe, is Me, Go Radio, Moving Mountains, The Ready Set, The Expendables, MC Lars with Weerd Science, A Day to Remember, Paramore, Asking Alexandria and The Devil Wears Prada.
We also took home a lot of free and inexpensive Cd's, posters, stickers and some shirts. Caelyn was hitting every merchandise tent she could find and many them were giving her free stuff. She loves it when people give her things.
Caelyn's top three must see bands were Paramore, MC Lars and The Devil Wears Prada. Fortunately, there were no time conflicts so we got see all three of them. However, our experience with MC Lars was the best. Not only did Caelyn get to meet him on a couple of occasions during the day, he spent time talking with her and taking pictures. He even signed her hat writing on it that she was a rock star and drawing a picture. It now has become one of her prized possessions.
We arrived that morning as the gates were opening at 11 am. As they day was ending around 9 pm, I still had one amped up kid. She eventually fell asleep on the drive back to our friend's house where we were staying. Her mother and brother were awake when we arrived and as Caelyn started to recount the days events, she just got more excited. Eventually, she went to bed but it took a long time. When she finally did pass out, she slept the sleep of the exhausted and happy. We both did.
I am probably considered to old to be attending punk and metal music festivals but it was OK because between me and Caelyn, our average age was twenty two and a half.
While I didn't see everyone there, I do believe she was the youngest one attending. I did see a handful of kids in the nine and ten year old range but no one came close to being as young and as small as Caelyn was.
I have to admit, I was a little nervous that maybe I had pushed my daughter a little too far this time. She was excited to go. For weeks she had been demanding this band or that band be put on "the list" of bands she wanted to see as I played music for her. So I wasn't worried about her enjoying the music. That wasn't even an issue.
At the Skullcandy Stage for Pour Habit
As it turns out, my fears were totally without basis. Much like Punk Island a month or so ago, Caelyn was perfectly at ease with the noise and chaos. More than that, she thrived in it. The only conflict we had was when I wouldn't bring to the edge of a particularly rough mosh pit. She saw no reason for there to be anyone between us and it. I did and had to explain to her that I kept a couple of people between us and the pit because her getting kicked in the head would hurt.
Chaos for The Devil Wears Prada
There is no kiddie section at the Warped Tour. There are no bounce houses or areas geared toward small children. It's music, merchandise and food. Those are your options. And we hit all of those in abundance.
In no particular order we saw all or part of the sets of the following bands: Pour Habit, Set Your Goals, Woe, is Me, Go Radio, Moving Mountains, The Ready Set, The Expendables, MC Lars with Weerd Science, A Day to Remember, Paramore, Asking Alexandria and The Devil Wears Prada.
We also took home a lot of free and inexpensive Cd's, posters, stickers and some shirts. Caelyn was hitting every merchandise tent she could find and many them were giving her free stuff. She loves it when people give her things.
Caelyn's top three must see bands were Paramore, MC Lars and The Devil Wears Prada. Fortunately, there were no time conflicts so we got see all three of them. However, our experience with MC Lars was the best. Not only did Caelyn get to meet him on a couple of occasions during the day, he spent time talking with her and taking pictures. He even signed her hat writing on it that she was a rock star and drawing a picture. It now has become one of her prized possessions.
With MC Lars
Up Front for his show. She did get acknowledged from the Stage
Monday, July 25, 2011
Not a Fun Age
My son Caleb doesn't really get a lot of coverage in this blog. Most of the post's are about my daughter. It's not that there is bias, I love both my kids, but my son doesn't do a whole lot yet that makes for interesting reading.
Part of this is because his life revolves around Caelyn's schedule. He has Gymboree and Music Together but most of his outings are dictated by his sister's activities. He comes along for her Taekwondo and dance classes. He goes with us on her play dates. It is just the existence of a two year old in a five year old's world.
The other reason he doesn't get a lot of coverage is because his activities are pretty much the same every day. He eats and sleeps. He watches some t.v. He screams and throws a lot of tantrums. He starts fights with his sister by pulling her hair or taking the one toy she has decided to play with. If he is not doing one of the things mentioned above, he generally is either tearing something apart or just throwing everything he can reach on the floor.
It's fortunate for Caleb that he is so cute or else he would be one of the most hated kids at the do jang and dance studio. He is every bit the two year old boy with a vengeance.
Which brings me to something that scares me terribly. I get a lot of parents with older children who watch his antics and say to me, "They are so much fun at that age." This shocks me because they aren't, not really. He is not much fun most of the time. Just ask his mother who almost had a large clump of hair pulled out by the roots yesterday. It's not much fun at all. I can't wait for him to grow out of it.
Sure, there are times that are cute and clever and I enjoy them immensely but for every cute thing he does, there are probably 20 tantrums or bouts of destructive behaviour.
So I wonder about these parents. Did they somehow have perfect two year olds? Maybe they are the type that look back at that time and just forget the screaming fits and tantrums. Or are things so bad now that their kids are older that handling a two year old seems easy by comparison.
I guess I'll find out in about a little over 10 years when he becomes a teenager.
Part of this is because his life revolves around Caelyn's schedule. He has Gymboree and Music Together but most of his outings are dictated by his sister's activities. He comes along for her Taekwondo and dance classes. He goes with us on her play dates. It is just the existence of a two year old in a five year old's world.
The other reason he doesn't get a lot of coverage is because his activities are pretty much the same every day. He eats and sleeps. He watches some t.v. He screams and throws a lot of tantrums. He starts fights with his sister by pulling her hair or taking the one toy she has decided to play with. If he is not doing one of the things mentioned above, he generally is either tearing something apart or just throwing everything he can reach on the floor.
It's fortunate for Caleb that he is so cute or else he would be one of the most hated kids at the do jang and dance studio. He is every bit the two year old boy with a vengeance.
Which brings me to something that scares me terribly. I get a lot of parents with older children who watch his antics and say to me, "They are so much fun at that age." This shocks me because they aren't, not really. He is not much fun most of the time. Just ask his mother who almost had a large clump of hair pulled out by the roots yesterday. It's not much fun at all. I can't wait for him to grow out of it.
Sure, there are times that are cute and clever and I enjoy them immensely but for every cute thing he does, there are probably 20 tantrums or bouts of destructive behaviour.
So I wonder about these parents. Did they somehow have perfect two year olds? Maybe they are the type that look back at that time and just forget the screaming fits and tantrums. Or are things so bad now that their kids are older that handling a two year old seems easy by comparison.
I guess I'll find out in about a little over 10 years when he becomes a teenager.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Summer Has Taken Off
After a slow start to our summer, we have seen a flurry of activity over the last few weeks. We spent the first week and a half after the end of school dealing with one illness or another. Our time was filled with long, slow moving days as one member or another of our family was ill and we had to stay close to home. Then, starting with Caelyn's date things just took off and I have been treading water ever since.
While the discovery of Caleb's peanut allergy was an unwelcome adventure, most of it has been quite fun. There are many stories to tell and I plan to do so in more detail over the next week or so but for now, here is the recap.
Since Caelyn's date we have had Caleb's allergic reaction to peanuts and his first trip to an allergist a little over a week later. Kerry and I are now learning to read labels on everything and to check out every restaurant, fast food joint and food vendor before giving anything to our son to eat. This has not been fun.
However, most of our time has been spent more enjoyably.
The last few weeks have seen two trips to Madison Square Park with the kids for concerts. It has seen Caelyn earn her red striped belt in Taekwondo. There was the fourth of July parade and town picnic. Caelyn has acquired a new bike while Caleb has staked his claim to her old one. I think he likes that it is pink and purple.
There have been play dates, playgrounds and of course, there was our mini vacation in the Poconos. While there Caelyn and I hit the Warped Tour in Scranton and Kerry and Caleb hit the playground and the woods of Big Bass Lake. The whole family went to visit a train museum in Scranton. The weekend there brought lake time and a late night at a county fair complete with a fireworks display. We came home needing a vacation from our vacation.
It doesn't look to slow down any time soon. The next couple of weeks will see us planning Caelyn's birthday party which is always a time consumer.
Next week there will be at least one more concert and starting in August, Caelyn will have a week of gymnastics camp followed by a week of dance camp and then cousin Kali arrives for a few days. Nana will be here around Labor Day and then school will start again.
I started out this summer wondering what I was going to with the kids and if they would bored. Now I am just trying to keep up with all that is going on. It's a pretty cool feeling.
While the discovery of Caleb's peanut allergy was an unwelcome adventure, most of it has been quite fun. There are many stories to tell and I plan to do so in more detail over the next week or so but for now, here is the recap.
Since Caelyn's date we have had Caleb's allergic reaction to peanuts and his first trip to an allergist a little over a week later. Kerry and I are now learning to read labels on everything and to check out every restaurant, fast food joint and food vendor before giving anything to our son to eat. This has not been fun.
However, most of our time has been spent more enjoyably.
The last few weeks have seen two trips to Madison Square Park with the kids for concerts. It has seen Caelyn earn her red striped belt in Taekwondo. There was the fourth of July parade and town picnic. Caelyn has acquired a new bike while Caleb has staked his claim to her old one. I think he likes that it is pink and purple.
There have been play dates, playgrounds and of course, there was our mini vacation in the Poconos. While there Caelyn and I hit the Warped Tour in Scranton and Kerry and Caleb hit the playground and the woods of Big Bass Lake. The whole family went to visit a train museum in Scranton. The weekend there brought lake time and a late night at a county fair complete with a fireworks display. We came home needing a vacation from our vacation.
It doesn't look to slow down any time soon. The next couple of weeks will see us planning Caelyn's birthday party which is always a time consumer.
Next week there will be at least one more concert and starting in August, Caelyn will have a week of gymnastics camp followed by a week of dance camp and then cousin Kali arrives for a few days. Nana will be here around Labor Day and then school will start again.
I started out this summer wondering what I was going to with the kids and if they would bored. Now I am just trying to keep up with all that is going on. It's a pretty cool feeling.
Saturday, July 2, 2011
So This is What a Food Allergy Looks Like
To say last night did not go according to plan would be an understatement. Anytime you end up in the ER with a crying two year old who is fighting off nurses and doctors, you know your evening has gone off the rails.
The night started simple enough. We would walk about a mile over to Brookdale Park where the U.S. Military Academy Band was performing followed by a fireworks display. We were to meet up with friends, relax and enjoy the show while the kids played then head home with two tired children who would promptly go to bed.
Well, that was the plan. Before the night ended though, I was in the ER with Caleb as he experienced an allergic reaction and Caelyn was on her first sleepover, with a boy no less. Definitely not how I expected the evening to go.
When we arrived at Brookdale for the show, I got word from our friend Amy that she and her son Matthew who is Caelyn's age were there and they made their way to where we were setting up our spot on the lawn. Interesting enough, we were at the same park last year for a concert and fireworks display with Amy when Caelyn got lost in the crowd. Perhaps we should stay away from fireworks displays at Brookdale in the future.
Caelyn had been eyeing the ice cream truck at the back of the crowd since we arrived so we took the kids to get ice cream. Kerry got ice cream as well. It was an ice cream bar with Reese's Peanut Butter Cups mixed in.
While we had never given Caleb peanuts before, we were not concerned about him having an allergic reaction to them. We had them in the house and didn't hesitate to give him foods that warned they had been processed on equipment that handled nuts. So when Caleb begged a bite of ice cream from is mom, it didn't even cross our minds that there could be a problem.
Caleb ate a few bites of ice cream then started running around again. About 1/2 hour later his nose was running, his eyes were red and watering, his face was getting puffy and he started scratching himself all over.
Having had eczema problems periodically for most if his life, Caleb's itching didn't raise any alarm bells at first. He was over tired and out in a field. We just thought something in the grass was bothering him.
As things started to get worse, Kerry remembered the peanut butter in the ice cream. Amy remembered the EMTs at the park and volunteered to watch Caelyn while Kerry and I took Caleb to be checked out.
The EMTs took all of two minutes to decide the best and safest course of action was to take Caleb to the ER. I took him and headed to the ambulance while Kerry went back to look after Caelyn.
It was my first time in an ambulance. The EMTs were wonderful. They kept close tabs on Caleb and didn't leave us until the triage nurse called us in shortly after we arrived.
The triage nurse and the ER doctor provided quick care and determined that while Caleb was definitely having an allergic reaction, there was no immediate danger. His oxygen and pulse rate were fine and he had no trouble breathing.
For his part, Caleb was pissed. He did not want people messing with him. So when it came time to administer the shot of Benadryl, it took me, the doctor and the triage nurse to hold him still.
The Benadryl kicked in and Caleb quickly fell asleep with me lying next to him. Oddly enough, the ER room we were placed in was the same room I was placed in when I had to be hospitalized for high blood pressure years earlier. We spent the next couple of hours keeping tabs on Caleb before it was fully determined the Benadryl was doing the job and Caleb could be discharged.
While all this was going on at the ER, Kerry and Caelyn were still in Brookdale Park. Kerry was worrying about Caleb while I would periodically send her updates. Caelyn was caught up in the excitement of the fireworks. According to Kerry, it was hard to tell whether our daughter or the fireworks were louder.
When the fireworks were over, Amy asked if Kerry wanted Caelyn to come home with them since Kerry would be heading to the ER soon. Caelyn heard the question and that sealed the deal. Her first sleepover was to begin and Caelyn went home with Amy and Matthew.
Caelyn had never spent the night away from both Kerry and I before so we fully expected to get a call in the middle of the night. That call never came. Caelyn had a blast. She and Matthew watched a show then went to sleep on the futon in the play room and didn't wake until morning though according to Matthew, Caelyn snores which is something Kerry and I already knew.
Caleb spent the night in bed with Kerry and I. Neither of us slept that well. We had to give Caleb a 3 a.m. dose of Benadryl and our minds had a tough time winding down from the days events.
When morning came, I went to pick Caelyn up. When we got home and she saw her brother, her relief was evident as she exclaimed, "He looks OK."
Now I am getting used to the idea of having a child with a food allergy. I will be picking up epi-pens later on today. They will now go everywhere we go. I threw out the peanuts I had in the cabinet and will now need to read every label to look for things processed on equipment that handles nuts. I also have to watch out for things cooked in peanut oil. All things I never thought about less than 24 hours before.
Life is funny that way. Just when you think you know what's what, the world shifts. So now we shift with it and thank God that Caleb is home safe and sound.
The night started simple enough. We would walk about a mile over to Brookdale Park where the U.S. Military Academy Band was performing followed by a fireworks display. We were to meet up with friends, relax and enjoy the show while the kids played then head home with two tired children who would promptly go to bed.
Well, that was the plan. Before the night ended though, I was in the ER with Caleb as he experienced an allergic reaction and Caelyn was on her first sleepover, with a boy no less. Definitely not how I expected the evening to go.
When we arrived at Brookdale for the show, I got word from our friend Amy that she and her son Matthew who is Caelyn's age were there and they made their way to where we were setting up our spot on the lawn. Interesting enough, we were at the same park last year for a concert and fireworks display with Amy when Caelyn got lost in the crowd. Perhaps we should stay away from fireworks displays at Brookdale in the future.
Caelyn had been eyeing the ice cream truck at the back of the crowd since we arrived so we took the kids to get ice cream. Kerry got ice cream as well. It was an ice cream bar with Reese's Peanut Butter Cups mixed in.
While we had never given Caleb peanuts before, we were not concerned about him having an allergic reaction to them. We had them in the house and didn't hesitate to give him foods that warned they had been processed on equipment that handled nuts. So when Caleb begged a bite of ice cream from is mom, it didn't even cross our minds that there could be a problem.
Caleb ate a few bites of ice cream then started running around again. About 1/2 hour later his nose was running, his eyes were red and watering, his face was getting puffy and he started scratching himself all over.
Having had eczema problems periodically for most if his life, Caleb's itching didn't raise any alarm bells at first. He was over tired and out in a field. We just thought something in the grass was bothering him.
As things started to get worse, Kerry remembered the peanut butter in the ice cream. Amy remembered the EMTs at the park and volunteered to watch Caelyn while Kerry and I took Caleb to be checked out.
The EMTs took all of two minutes to decide the best and safest course of action was to take Caleb to the ER. I took him and headed to the ambulance while Kerry went back to look after Caelyn.
It was my first time in an ambulance. The EMTs were wonderful. They kept close tabs on Caleb and didn't leave us until the triage nurse called us in shortly after we arrived.
The triage nurse and the ER doctor provided quick care and determined that while Caleb was definitely having an allergic reaction, there was no immediate danger. His oxygen and pulse rate were fine and he had no trouble breathing.
For his part, Caleb was pissed. He did not want people messing with him. So when it came time to administer the shot of Benadryl, it took me, the doctor and the triage nurse to hold him still.
The Benadryl kicked in and Caleb quickly fell asleep with me lying next to him. Oddly enough, the ER room we were placed in was the same room I was placed in when I had to be hospitalized for high blood pressure years earlier. We spent the next couple of hours keeping tabs on Caleb before it was fully determined the Benadryl was doing the job and Caleb could be discharged.
While all this was going on at the ER, Kerry and Caelyn were still in Brookdale Park. Kerry was worrying about Caleb while I would periodically send her updates. Caelyn was caught up in the excitement of the fireworks. According to Kerry, it was hard to tell whether our daughter or the fireworks were louder.
When the fireworks were over, Amy asked if Kerry wanted Caelyn to come home with them since Kerry would be heading to the ER soon. Caelyn heard the question and that sealed the deal. Her first sleepover was to begin and Caelyn went home with Amy and Matthew.
Caelyn had never spent the night away from both Kerry and I before so we fully expected to get a call in the middle of the night. That call never came. Caelyn had a blast. She and Matthew watched a show then went to sleep on the futon in the play room and didn't wake until morning though according to Matthew, Caelyn snores which is something Kerry and I already knew.
Caleb spent the night in bed with Kerry and I. Neither of us slept that well. We had to give Caleb a 3 a.m. dose of Benadryl and our minds had a tough time winding down from the days events.
When morning came, I went to pick Caelyn up. When we got home and she saw her brother, her relief was evident as she exclaimed, "He looks OK."
Now I am getting used to the idea of having a child with a food allergy. I will be picking up epi-pens later on today. They will now go everywhere we go. I threw out the peanuts I had in the cabinet and will now need to read every label to look for things processed on equipment that handles nuts. I also have to watch out for things cooked in peanut oil. All things I never thought about less than 24 hours before.
Life is funny that way. Just when you think you know what's what, the world shifts. So now we shift with it and thank God that Caleb is home safe and sound.
Friday, July 1, 2011
Did My Daughter Have a Date?
Yesterday, Caelyn, Caleb and I travelled into Manhattan with friends and it has me wondering, did my daughter have a date?
Kid's rocker Aurdrarox was playing a show in Madison Square Park yesterday morning. Based in Brooklyn, she plays regularly in the area and is one of Caelyn and Caleb's favorites. When discussing our plans with a friend whose son Aiden is Caelyn's age and whose daughter Kiera is just a little older than Caleb, the conversation turned to seeing if they wanted to go with us. Fortunately, they did.
Caelyn and Aiden have and interesting relationship. Basically, they adore each other. They have been taking Taekwon-do together for close to a year and their favorite classes are the ones where the other is there with them.
Due to school schedules, though, the first time they have been around each other outside the dojang was yesterday. This did not stop Aiden however from declaring that he was going to marry Caelyn in 25 years or Caelyn from saying she agreed to the proposal.
Aiden's mom Lazette and I put together the details. We would load all four kids into our van, travel into Manhattan for Audrarox's show, then hit a playground and eat nearby.
With this plan in place, I started to get nervous when Caelyn's high fever early in the week stubbornly persisted. By Wednesday, it was still present but lower than before. I contacted Lazette to she if she wanted to change the plan but we both agreed, unless there was a serious downturn, we were going ahead.
While I was not there to see it, I understand Aiden did a dance on the porch when given the news about Thursday's plans. When Caelyn and Aiden saw each other later that Wednesday at the dojang, Aiden was beside himself, talking quickly and loudly about the next days trip into the city.
As Caelyn had yet not been told about it, she looked a little confused. It just didn't click for her that Aiden was discussing plans he had with her. When I told her later on about the plan, she stared at me in disbelief. Then she smiled. It wasn't just her mouth that smiled, but her whole body. Then the bouncing started.
Yesterday morning, Aiden was waiting on the front porch when I pulled into the driveway. We had an uneventful trip in but it was loud, very loud. Caelyn and Aiden were sitting together in the back of the van trying to see who could talk the loudest and the fastest. At least, that is what it seemed like to me up front.
Meanwhile, Caleb and Kiera were the calm ones. Caleb bounced happily to the music while Kiera colored in her coloring book. Lazette and I just talked and laughed at the noise coming from the back as we made our way through the last of the morning rush.
Fortunately, the church we attend in Manhattan is near Madison Square Park so I was able to get street parking in the restricted area in front of it. We made it to the stage about 5 minutes before the show began.
Caelyn, Caleb and Aiden made their way to the front where they watched and danced. Sometimes they danced alone, sometimes Caelyn and Aiden danced together and sometimes they just watched while holding hands.
After Audrarox finished her set, it was playground time. The playground there in the park was a madhouse. Tons of kids, running, screaming and playing. They had a blast.
When it was time for lunch, Kerry was able to sneak out of her office for a bit to join us.
After I told Lazette Kerry would be joining us, she responded, "Good. Another set of hands." And boy did we need them. None of the children acted badly in the restaurant but there were four of them. Two are five, one is three and the other is two so you can imagine how that went.
After our escape from the restaurant, Kerry went back to work and Lazette and I walked the kids to Union Square for playground number two.
Finally, the kids were done. They had nothing left in the tank so it was back to the van for the drive home. The ride back was much quieter. All four children fell asleep. It was a sure sign of a day well spent.
After goodbyes were said and I was driving home, I wondered to myself, "Did I my daughter just have a date?"
After all, they saw a show, went out to eat and walked through the city hand in hand at times. It certainly sounds like a date. And they do plan to be married.
I guess we will just have to see what time brings but I know this, if they do end up getting married in 25 years, I will be reading this at their reception.
Kid's rocker Aurdrarox was playing a show in Madison Square Park yesterday morning. Based in Brooklyn, she plays regularly in the area and is one of Caelyn and Caleb's favorites. When discussing our plans with a friend whose son Aiden is Caelyn's age and whose daughter Kiera is just a little older than Caleb, the conversation turned to seeing if they wanted to go with us. Fortunately, they did.
Caelyn and Aiden have and interesting relationship. Basically, they adore each other. They have been taking Taekwon-do together for close to a year and their favorite classes are the ones where the other is there with them.
Due to school schedules, though, the first time they have been around each other outside the dojang was yesterday. This did not stop Aiden however from declaring that he was going to marry Caelyn in 25 years or Caelyn from saying she agreed to the proposal.
Aiden's mom Lazette and I put together the details. We would load all four kids into our van, travel into Manhattan for Audrarox's show, then hit a playground and eat nearby.
With this plan in place, I started to get nervous when Caelyn's high fever early in the week stubbornly persisted. By Wednesday, it was still present but lower than before. I contacted Lazette to she if she wanted to change the plan but we both agreed, unless there was a serious downturn, we were going ahead.
While I was not there to see it, I understand Aiden did a dance on the porch when given the news about Thursday's plans. When Caelyn and Aiden saw each other later that Wednesday at the dojang, Aiden was beside himself, talking quickly and loudly about the next days trip into the city.
As Caelyn had yet not been told about it, she looked a little confused. It just didn't click for her that Aiden was discussing plans he had with her. When I told her later on about the plan, she stared at me in disbelief. Then she smiled. It wasn't just her mouth that smiled, but her whole body. Then the bouncing started.
Yesterday morning, Aiden was waiting on the front porch when I pulled into the driveway. We had an uneventful trip in but it was loud, very loud. Caelyn and Aiden were sitting together in the back of the van trying to see who could talk the loudest and the fastest. At least, that is what it seemed like to me up front.
Meanwhile, Caleb and Kiera were the calm ones. Caleb bounced happily to the music while Kiera colored in her coloring book. Lazette and I just talked and laughed at the noise coming from the back as we made our way through the last of the morning rush.
Fortunately, the church we attend in Manhattan is near Madison Square Park so I was able to get street parking in the restricted area in front of it. We made it to the stage about 5 minutes before the show began.
Caelyn, Caleb and Aiden made their way to the front where they watched and danced. Sometimes they danced alone, sometimes Caelyn and Aiden danced together and sometimes they just watched while holding hands.
After Audrarox finished her set, it was playground time. The playground there in the park was a madhouse. Tons of kids, running, screaming and playing. They had a blast.
When it was time for lunch, Kerry was able to sneak out of her office for a bit to join us.
After I told Lazette Kerry would be joining us, she responded, "Good. Another set of hands." And boy did we need them. None of the children acted badly in the restaurant but there were four of them. Two are five, one is three and the other is two so you can imagine how that went.
After our escape from the restaurant, Kerry went back to work and Lazette and I walked the kids to Union Square for playground number two.
Finally, the kids were done. They had nothing left in the tank so it was back to the van for the drive home. The ride back was much quieter. All four children fell asleep. It was a sure sign of a day well spent.
After goodbyes were said and I was driving home, I wondered to myself, "Did I my daughter just have a date?"
After all, they saw a show, went out to eat and walked through the city hand in hand at times. It certainly sounds like a date. And they do plan to be married.
I guess we will just have to see what time brings but I know this, if they do end up getting married in 25 years, I will be reading this at their reception.
Monday, June 27, 2011
Day With a Sick Daughter
I have a sick daughter today. Nothing serious. According to the doctor it's just your run of the mill make you feel like crap virus.
Caelyn started coming down with a fever yesterday at church. Looking back at how she was acting before we left for church, she was probably coming down with it then but we had no idea. We just figured she hadn't slept well.
When we got home and checked her temperature, it came in at around 104. I know some people who read this think that is high but we didn't even blink. We've been there too many times before.
Caelyn and fevers have a long history of taking things to the extreme. She almost never gets a temperature of 101 or something like that. It's either normal or at least 103. Once her temperature was so high the doctor's response was, "Well, if she was going to have seizures, she would have done it by now."
So, 104 did not particularly alarm us. We treated it with medicine that knocked it down to 101 where she was much more comfortable.
There is nothing and no one so pitiful as Caelyn when she is feeling ill. She whines and whimpers. She complains over and over again about this or that not being right. Everything is a battle and her volatility goes off the scale. It is a fight to get her to eat or even take medicine she knows will help her. Any and every little thing can set off a meltdown. The only thing she wants to do is curl up and whine.
This morning I gave Caelyn some medicine to take. She had finished the flavor she liked so she had to try something new. The result was Caelyn throwing a fit about how she didn't like the taste. She finally drank it but because she had gotten herself so worked up, she spit a bunch of it up on her nightgown.
Once I cleaned her up, it was time to take her to the doctor's where after a strep test came back negative, he declared it the above mentioned virus. Considering I know of at least 2 other families with kids with similar illnesses, I imagine it is just one making the rounds.
Much of the rest of the day was spent on the couch with Caelyn. Fortunately, her brother took a very long nap giving Caelyn time to rest and even sleep a bit.
As I write this, Caelyn is in her room with her mommy trying to go to sleep. Hopefully, she will sleep better tonight than she did last night and the fever will have broken by morning. It's tough seeing your kid suffer, even when it is something as common as this.
I want to take it all away from her. I want to be able to just reach my hand out and remove that which makes her feel so bad. Unfortunately, I can't. But what I can do is hold her, comfort her, and care for her until she feels better. Here's hoping that will be soon.
Caelyn started coming down with a fever yesterday at church. Looking back at how she was acting before we left for church, she was probably coming down with it then but we had no idea. We just figured she hadn't slept well.
When we got home and checked her temperature, it came in at around 104. I know some people who read this think that is high but we didn't even blink. We've been there too many times before.
Caelyn and fevers have a long history of taking things to the extreme. She almost never gets a temperature of 101 or something like that. It's either normal or at least 103. Once her temperature was so high the doctor's response was, "Well, if she was going to have seizures, she would have done it by now."
So, 104 did not particularly alarm us. We treated it with medicine that knocked it down to 101 where she was much more comfortable.
There is nothing and no one so pitiful as Caelyn when she is feeling ill. She whines and whimpers. She complains over and over again about this or that not being right. Everything is a battle and her volatility goes off the scale. It is a fight to get her to eat or even take medicine she knows will help her. Any and every little thing can set off a meltdown. The only thing she wants to do is curl up and whine.
This morning I gave Caelyn some medicine to take. She had finished the flavor she liked so she had to try something new. The result was Caelyn throwing a fit about how she didn't like the taste. She finally drank it but because she had gotten herself so worked up, she spit a bunch of it up on her nightgown.
Once I cleaned her up, it was time to take her to the doctor's where after a strep test came back negative, he declared it the above mentioned virus. Considering I know of at least 2 other families with kids with similar illnesses, I imagine it is just one making the rounds.
Much of the rest of the day was spent on the couch with Caelyn. Fortunately, her brother took a very long nap giving Caelyn time to rest and even sleep a bit.
As I write this, Caelyn is in her room with her mommy trying to go to sleep. Hopefully, she will sleep better tonight than she did last night and the fever will have broken by morning. It's tough seeing your kid suffer, even when it is something as common as this.
I want to take it all away from her. I want to be able to just reach my hand out and remove that which makes her feel so bad. Unfortunately, I can't. But what I can do is hold her, comfort her, and care for her until she feels better. Here's hoping that will be soon.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Punk Island Redux: Part 2 - Rambling Observations
I imagine this happens with all parents but there are times when I wonder if my own opinions are pushing my children in one direction or another. I wonder if I am projecting my own likes and dislikes onto them. In this particular case, I wonder if my musical taste and tendencies are pushing my daughter in the direction of what I like rather than what she likes.
Then I see her at an event like Punk Island this past Sunday and I know, it's not just me. This is her thing as much as it is mine.
Caelyn was dressed Sunday in her punk rock best. Well, the best that we will allow her to have at the moment. Dyed blood red hair, Ramones t-shirt, blue jean shorts and mis-matched pink and purple Chucks. Tattoos and piercings will have to wait until she is older. =-)
What is so interesting to me about all this is she is not playing dress up. As one friend remarked, this is who she is. I wasn't some excited dad trying to relive his youth though I was excited and had a great time. I was a father allowing his daughter to be who she was and flourish in her element. And a festival loaded with a bunch of punks was just that, her element.
Caelyn was completely comfortable being surrounded by people with multi-colored hair, giant mohawks, and tons of piercings and tattoos. She got excited and pointed out each Ramones shirt or pair of Chucks she saw. She loved the music and demanded to be either right in front or on my shoulders so she could see. She was also thrilled by the mosh pits. She only wished she could join in.
We met one of the bands, The Furiousity, while waiting for the ferry. Caelyn was shy for about 2 seconds and then joined right in. They were great to us and especially to her. They not only gave her some stuff to keep but made her a part of their group. For a while she was in charge of their mascot. Their singer came over to her a couple of times during their set and whenever we would run into them throughout the day, they made a point of waving Caelyn over and talking to her. Caelyn loved every minute of it.
As a parent, nothing makes me feel happier than seeing my child happy. And when that happiness comes due to the kindness of others, I feel particularly fond of them. So while they probably will never read this, I can't thank The Furiousity enough.
In addition to the music, people everywhere were making a fuss over Caelyn. Particularly the girls and women at the show. Punk is a pretty male dominated scene and Caelyn had many girls of all ages come over to say hi and they liked her hair or her shirt or her shoes.
We were approached by the drum instructor for Willie Mae Rock Camp for Girls in Brooklyn to tell us about their program for when she gets older. Caelyn also had a lot of cameras pointed her way throughout the day including one posed shot of the two of us together.
I don't know what exactly it was that did it, but Caelyn had some of the toughest looking punks fawning over her. And not one person looked at her or treated her like she didn't belong.
When the day was over and the last band had finished, we made our way to the pier to catch the Brooklyn ferry. Waiting on line for the boat to come, she met another little girl slightly older than her.
This girl was with her parents and they were simply there to explore Governors Island. It took the two girls (Caelyn in her punk outfit and the other in her pretty summer dress) just a few minutes to become fast friends. They spent the wait time playing in the dirt, walked hand in hand to the ferry and had to stay together through the trip back. When it was time to go our separate ways, there were big hugs.
We spent the ride home listening to the Cd's Caelyn had gotten while she tried to convince me her hair should stay red for school the next day. It was fine with me but she had been in the sun all day and was covered in sunscreen so a shower was a necessity and the dye was wash out. Fortunately for her, Johnson's Baby Shampoo' didn't do such a great job on the red so she was able to keep it for school on Monday.
Then I see her at an event like Punk Island this past Sunday and I know, it's not just me. This is her thing as much as it is mine.
Caelyn was dressed Sunday in her punk rock best. Well, the best that we will allow her to have at the moment. Dyed blood red hair, Ramones t-shirt, blue jean shorts and mis-matched pink and purple Chucks. Tattoos and piercings will have to wait until she is older. =-)
What is so interesting to me about all this is she is not playing dress up. As one friend remarked, this is who she is. I wasn't some excited dad trying to relive his youth though I was excited and had a great time. I was a father allowing his daughter to be who she was and flourish in her element. And a festival loaded with a bunch of punks was just that, her element.
Caelyn was completely comfortable being surrounded by people with multi-colored hair, giant mohawks, and tons of piercings and tattoos. She got excited and pointed out each Ramones shirt or pair of Chucks she saw. She loved the music and demanded to be either right in front or on my shoulders so she could see. She was also thrilled by the mosh pits. She only wished she could join in.
We met one of the bands, The Furiousity, while waiting for the ferry. Caelyn was shy for about 2 seconds and then joined right in. They were great to us and especially to her. They not only gave her some stuff to keep but made her a part of their group. For a while she was in charge of their mascot. Their singer came over to her a couple of times during their set and whenever we would run into them throughout the day, they made a point of waving Caelyn over and talking to her. Caelyn loved every minute of it.
As a parent, nothing makes me feel happier than seeing my child happy. And when that happiness comes due to the kindness of others, I feel particularly fond of them. So while they probably will never read this, I can't thank The Furiousity enough.
In addition to the music, people everywhere were making a fuss over Caelyn. Particularly the girls and women at the show. Punk is a pretty male dominated scene and Caelyn had many girls of all ages come over to say hi and they liked her hair or her shirt or her shoes.
We were approached by the drum instructor for Willie Mae Rock Camp for Girls in Brooklyn to tell us about their program for when she gets older. Caelyn also had a lot of cameras pointed her way throughout the day including one posed shot of the two of us together.
I don't know what exactly it was that did it, but Caelyn had some of the toughest looking punks fawning over her. And not one person looked at her or treated her like she didn't belong.
When the day was over and the last band had finished, we made our way to the pier to catch the Brooklyn ferry. Waiting on line for the boat to come, she met another little girl slightly older than her.
This girl was with her parents and they were simply there to explore Governors Island. It took the two girls (Caelyn in her punk outfit and the other in her pretty summer dress) just a few minutes to become fast friends. They spent the wait time playing in the dirt, walked hand in hand to the ferry and had to stay together through the trip back. When it was time to go our separate ways, there were big hugs.
We spent the ride home listening to the Cd's Caelyn had gotten while she tried to convince me her hair should stay red for school the next day. It was fine with me but she had been in the sun all day and was covered in sunscreen so a shower was a necessity and the dye was wash out. Fortunately for her, Johnson's Baby Shampoo' didn't do such a great job on the red so she was able to keep it for school on Monday.
Monday, June 20, 2011
Punk Island Redux: Part 1 - Timeline
Fathers day has come and gone. Now is time for the memories of a day well spent with my little girl.
As mentioned in a previous post, my father's day plan was to spend the day with my daughter enjoying Punk Island 2011. The event, which took place on Governors Island, brought together 8 stages of mostly local and regional punk bands. The day ended with a set by British anarcho-punk band Zounds whose only other U.S. show took place the night before.
Father's day started off with my daughter joining me in our room and snuggling me for about 1/2 hour before it was time to get moving. First, I had to find the present she created for me. I was informed it was hidden somewhere in our room so I searched until I found it.
It was then time to go downstairs where I was not to see what Caelyn and her mother were doing. A little bit later I was brought a very delicious egg sandwich which I happily ate.
After breakfast, it was time to get Caelyn ready for Punk Island. This began with a very clueless daddy breaking out the Manic Panic and dyeing a very excited little girl's hair vampire red. I can't claim it was a great dye job but she loved it and the overall results turned out pretty good once I got a little practice.
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Around 9:45 a.m. Caelyn and I headed to Brooklyn to catch the ferry to Governors Island. We arrived with plenty of time to catch the first of that days boats.
While waiting for the boat to arrive, I noticed the women in front of us had guitar cases and a bass amp with them. I mentioned to Caelyn they were probably one of the bands playing the festival.
They introduced themselves and gave Caelyn a couple of buttons and some stickers with the name of their band, The Furiousity, written across them. We spent the next 15 minutes or so talking with them. When it came time to board the ferry, Caelyn asked if we could sit with them and they made sure she had a spot with them on the boat.
We spent the trip to the island talking music. During the conversation it came out the I had recently been to Governors Island and knew the layout so I became the navigator. As we walked with The Furiousity to their stage assignment, Caelyn was talking, smiling, and in charge of their mascot.
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Once the set was over, we hung out with the band for a while longer and then it was time to check out more music. We picked up a CD and while we would see them several times throughout the rest of the day, we didn't know that then so we said our good-byes.
Caelyn and I took a snack break with more ice cream before going to check out The Homewreckers. It was a good set. Caelyn, of course, had to be right in front. A pit broke out behind us but she was oblivious to it. If someone came close, I just knocked them back and she was none the wiser. After the set, Caelyn met with the band and picked up some more stickers and a CD.
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By this time, it was getting late in the afternoon and the little girl needed to just run around so we played tag and checked out a sculpture exhibition contained in one of the old houses on the island. Then, we just rested for a bit before ging to see Zounds, the last band of the day.
Zounds is an old British punk band that dates back to the late 70s. They are right in my wheelhouse and sad to say, I was not familiar with them even though I know a lot of their peers. I was excited to see them as was most of the crowd. Zounds had only played one show in the U.S. before Punk Island and that had been the night before.
They were good. Really good. Caelyn was up on my shoulders for this set and we made our way as close to the front as possible.
Shortly after Zounds started, much to Caelyn's joy, a pit broke out around us. I moved us over to the edge and keeping her balanced on my shoulders with my left arm, shoved people around with my right. When the pit closed, we moved toward the front again.
When the pit started a started a second time, I moved back once again. This time I was about two feet or so from it's edge. Caelyn started moving back and forth, kicking her heels at me like she was riding a horse until I moved over the pit's edge and could shove people once again.
When Zounds ended, I asked if she wanted to try and meet them. She did so we made our way over and met the singer/guitarist. After speaking with him for a few minutes Caelyn noticed a large, partially blue cymbal with bumps all over it on the drum kit. She asked me what it as for. I didn't know so I told her she should ask the drummer as he was still there breaking down his gear.
As he was telling Caelyn about the cymbal, he reached down and pulled out a clearly used drumstick and gave it to Caelyn. She was thrilled and in a rare occurrence, speechless. After leaving the drummer we ran into the bassist who commented he had a four year old and thought it was great to see Caelyn at the show.
Walking to catch the ferry back to Brooklyn, Caelyn held up her drumstick and proclaimed it the best music day ever. I just smiled, a lot.
As mentioned in a previous post, my father's day plan was to spend the day with my daughter enjoying Punk Island 2011. The event, which took place on Governors Island, brought together 8 stages of mostly local and regional punk bands. The day ended with a set by British anarcho-punk band Zounds whose only other U.S. show took place the night before.
Father's day started off with my daughter joining me in our room and snuggling me for about 1/2 hour before it was time to get moving. First, I had to find the present she created for me. I was informed it was hidden somewhere in our room so I searched until I found it.
It was then time to go downstairs where I was not to see what Caelyn and her mother were doing. A little bit later I was brought a very delicious egg sandwich which I happily ate.
After breakfast, it was time to get Caelyn ready for Punk Island. This began with a very clueless daddy breaking out the Manic Panic and dyeing a very excited little girl's hair vampire red. I can't claim it was a great dye job but she loved it and the overall results turned out pretty good once I got a little practice.
A Work in Progress
Around 9:45 a.m. Caelyn and I headed to Brooklyn to catch the ferry to Governors Island. We arrived with plenty of time to catch the first of that days boats.
While waiting for the boat to arrive, I noticed the women in front of us had guitar cases and a bass amp with them. I mentioned to Caelyn they were probably one of the bands playing the festival.
They introduced themselves and gave Caelyn a couple of buttons and some stickers with the name of their band, The Furiousity, written across them. We spent the next 15 minutes or so talking with them. When it came time to board the ferry, Caelyn asked if we could sit with them and they made sure she had a spot with them on the boat.
We spent the trip to the island talking music. During the conversation it came out the I had recently been to Governors Island and knew the layout so I became the navigator. As we walked with The Furiousity to their stage assignment, Caelyn was talking, smiling, and in charge of their mascot.
Once we reached the stage, Caelyn was reluctant to leave the band. They graciously told us we were welcome to hang out as long as we wanted but as they had a lot of work to do before they played, I convinced Caelyn we would see them later and should get out of their way.
We grabbed some lunch and roamed the stages until a band called In Circles caught our attention. Led by a powerful female guitarist/singer, Caelyn was taken in immediately and made her way to the front. After the set, she spoke to the singer for a little bit and left with a CD.
Up Front for In Circles
It was now ice cream time before heading over to see Born in a Cent followed by Titfit. While watching Born in a Cent, we ran into some members of The Furiousity once again. This would be a reoccurring theme throughout the day with us seeing them many times both before and after they played.
Ice Cream Time
When Titfit finished it was time to see The Furiousity perform. As we arrived at the stage, Ashley, their singer, waved Caelyn over to join her sitting under her umbrella away from the sun where Caelyn stayed until it was time for them to go on.
The Furiousity's set was tight. There were some technical problems with the stage but they put on a really good show. Caelyn was jumping up and down and dancing and she wasn't the only one. It's too bad they are from Boston and don't play around here a lot or I would be taking Caelyn to see them regularly.
Ashley singing to Caelyn
Caelyn Dancing
Hanging Out After the Set
Once the set was over, we hung out with the band for a while longer and then it was time to check out more music. We picked up a CD and while we would see them several times throughout the rest of the day, we didn't know that then so we said our good-byes.
Caelyn and I took a snack break with more ice cream before going to check out The Homewreckers. It was a good set. Caelyn, of course, had to be right in front. A pit broke out behind us but she was oblivious to it. If someone came close, I just knocked them back and she was none the wiser. After the set, Caelyn met with the band and picked up some more stickers and a CD.
With The Homewreckers
By this time, it was getting late in the afternoon and the little girl needed to just run around so we played tag and checked out a sculpture exhibition contained in one of the old houses on the island. Then, we just rested for a bit before ging to see Zounds, the last band of the day.
Zounds is an old British punk band that dates back to the late 70s. They are right in my wheelhouse and sad to say, I was not familiar with them even though I know a lot of their peers. I was excited to see them as was most of the crowd. Zounds had only played one show in the U.S. before Punk Island and that had been the night before.
They were good. Really good. Caelyn was up on my shoulders for this set and we made our way as close to the front as possible.
Shortly after Zounds started, much to Caelyn's joy, a pit broke out around us. I moved us over to the edge and keeping her balanced on my shoulders with my left arm, shoved people around with my right. When the pit closed, we moved toward the front again.
When the pit started a started a second time, I moved back once again. This time I was about two feet or so from it's edge. Caelyn started moving back and forth, kicking her heels at me like she was riding a horse until I moved over the pit's edge and could shove people once again.
When Zounds ended, I asked if she wanted to try and meet them. She did so we made our way over and met the singer/guitarist. After speaking with him for a few minutes Caelyn noticed a large, partially blue cymbal with bumps all over it on the drum kit. She asked me what it as for. I didn't know so I told her she should ask the drummer as he was still there breaking down his gear.
As he was telling Caelyn about the cymbal, he reached down and pulled out a clearly used drumstick and gave it to Caelyn. She was thrilled and in a rare occurrence, speechless. After leaving the drummer we ran into the bassist who commented he had a four year old and thought it was great to see Caelyn at the show.
Walking to catch the ferry back to Brooklyn, Caelyn held up her drumstick and proclaimed it the best music day ever. I just smiled, a lot.
Friday, June 17, 2011
Punk Island Girl
This Sunday I will taking my 5 year old daughter to Punk Island 2011. Part of the Make Music New York Festival held on Tuesday the 21st, Punk Island will be a collection of 70 + acts spread across 8 stages for 6 hours on Governor's Island. Since Governor's Island isn't open to the public on Tuesdays, the organizers of Make Music New York decided to hold Punk Island on Sunday instead.
A couple of weeks ago I started to describe the event to Caelyn. I told her it was a bunch of loud, noisy punk bands. That was as far as I got before she interrupted me by yelling, "I wanna go! Can we go?" As my plan was to ask her if she was interested in going, I told her yes. She was upset however, when I told her she would not be allowed in the pit. I have to draw the line somewhere. =-)
Many of my Facebook posts revolve around Caelyn and her reaction to music. This is, in part, because I find it amusing. There is something intrinsically funny to me about a 5 year old running around in circles screaming Ramones at the top of her lungs when they come on or having to stop everything and dance every time something loud, hard and fast is played.
Music is a major part of Caelyn's life. Her love for it is very strong. I, of course, am the enabler or pusher in this case if you will. I have something playing almost all the time.
Music has been a strong love of mine for as long as I can remember. I still have the first album (actually it was a cassette) I ever bought with my own money. It was Joan Jett and the Blackhearts' I love Rock n Roll. I bought it from a place called Rat Records in the Village section of Houston.
It is a great thrill of mine to see Caelyn have the same passion and love for music that I do. I particularly like that her favorite type of music is as she puts it, the loud, noisy kind.
Ironically it was my wife, who is much more James Taylor than Johhny Rotten, who noticed our daughter's love of loud music. She noticed that as a baby, Caelyn would be in a better mood whenever guitar heavy songs were played. When she pointed this out to me, I pulled out countless cds, some mine, some Kerry's and played them to watch Caelyn's reactions. Sure enough, guitar driven music was what she responded to.
I have already mentioned in another post how The Distillers helped her through colic. We would use White Stripes to calm her late at night when she woke up coughing and confused. There was nothing like 'Blue Orchid" to bring her around when she would start to lose it during those late night hours.
As she has gotten older, she still prefers the noise. Particularly, played live. It could be a full scale, large stage show or just some band set up on a sidewalk and she will want to see them. She loves live music.
Last summer we took her to many smaller concerts around NYC. Mostly they were kid friendly rock bands that actually did rock. Then over Labor Day Weekend we took to RevGen 2010.
RevGen is a Christian music festival in southern NJ consisting of mostly metal, hard rock and hardcore bands. We figured it would be a good venue to see how she did with tens of thousands of people around. Plus there was some pretty good bands playing. She had a great time though my shoulders were a bit sore from all the time she spent on them. Click here to see video of Caelyn jammin to Fireflight's Desperate.
So this Sunday should be fun. She won't know any of the bands. She doesn't need to. All she needs to know is she will be seeing music performed all day long and she is happy and excited.
A couple of weeks ago I started to describe the event to Caelyn. I told her it was a bunch of loud, noisy punk bands. That was as far as I got before she interrupted me by yelling, "I wanna go! Can we go?" As my plan was to ask her if she was interested in going, I told her yes. She was upset however, when I told her she would not be allowed in the pit. I have to draw the line somewhere. =-)
Many of my Facebook posts revolve around Caelyn and her reaction to music. This is, in part, because I find it amusing. There is something intrinsically funny to me about a 5 year old running around in circles screaming Ramones at the top of her lungs when they come on or having to stop everything and dance every time something loud, hard and fast is played.
Music is a major part of Caelyn's life. Her love for it is very strong. I, of course, am the enabler or pusher in this case if you will. I have something playing almost all the time.
Music has been a strong love of mine for as long as I can remember. I still have the first album (actually it was a cassette) I ever bought with my own money. It was Joan Jett and the Blackhearts' I love Rock n Roll. I bought it from a place called Rat Records in the Village section of Houston.
It is a great thrill of mine to see Caelyn have the same passion and love for music that I do. I particularly like that her favorite type of music is as she puts it, the loud, noisy kind.
Ironically it was my wife, who is much more James Taylor than Johhny Rotten, who noticed our daughter's love of loud music. She noticed that as a baby, Caelyn would be in a better mood whenever guitar heavy songs were played. When she pointed this out to me, I pulled out countless cds, some mine, some Kerry's and played them to watch Caelyn's reactions. Sure enough, guitar driven music was what she responded to.
I have already mentioned in another post how The Distillers helped her through colic. We would use White Stripes to calm her late at night when she woke up coughing and confused. There was nothing like 'Blue Orchid" to bring her around when she would start to lose it during those late night hours.
As she has gotten older, she still prefers the noise. Particularly, played live. It could be a full scale, large stage show or just some band set up on a sidewalk and she will want to see them. She loves live music.
Last summer we took her to many smaller concerts around NYC. Mostly they were kid friendly rock bands that actually did rock. Then over Labor Day Weekend we took to RevGen 2010.
RevGen is a Christian music festival in southern NJ consisting of mostly metal, hard rock and hardcore bands. We figured it would be a good venue to see how she did with tens of thousands of people around. Plus there was some pretty good bands playing. She had a great time though my shoulders were a bit sore from all the time she spent on them. Click here to see video of Caelyn jammin to Fireflight's Desperate.
So this Sunday should be fun. She won't know any of the bands. She doesn't need to. All she needs to know is she will be seeing music performed all day long and she is happy and excited.
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Not Your Typical Girl
My daughter is not your average 5 year old. Perhaps, average isn't the right word. There really is no such thing as an average 5 year old.
At that age they are so full of potential and enthusiasm it is hard to call them average. Watch them closely and you can catch glimpses of who they could become. Their potential is almost limitless but you can see see their future demons in there also. It is an amazing age so average doesn't fit.
I hesitate to use the word normal. It's kind of a loaded word and it means different things to different people. So let's just say my daughter is not your typical 5 year old.
This is not surprising. She has always been a little different from kids her own age. There is just something in her personality.
I remember the ultrasound where we learned Caelyn was a girl. Her legs were tightly closed. The technician pushed at her from a variety of angles trying to get her to move. Each attempt was met with resistance. It took so long, I thought the technician would just give up. I was about ready to myself. It was then Caelyn finally moved. We saw this little foot on the monitor grow until it took up almost the entire screen. The technician jumped a little, then laughed. “She just kicked me,” she told us.
When Caelyn was too young to even crawl, she had a bout of colic. It was what I would call good colic, if there is such a thing. Rather than occurring at night, it would start around 4 pm. and end around 8 pm. It was frustrating but better than her screaming through the night.
One afternoon, after trying everything I could think of to calm her down, I just gave up. I went over to the computer and cranked The Distillers while I held Caelyn in my lap. For those who are not familiar with The Distillers, the simple description is they are a very noisy punk band. Upon hearing the music, Caelyn immediately calmed and fell asleep. It became our routine until the colic ended.
From before the age of two she loved The Ramones. For almost two years, it was the only thing she would listen to in the car without getting upset. At age three she asked me why they sounded different when I put on the Brain Drain CD. This was their first release after Dee Dee, their primary songwriter had left the band. Even at that early age, she noticed the slight change in musical style.
Her preferred shoe of choice, Converse Chuck Taylor High Tops. One pink, One purple. She has been wearing them that way for years and is genuinely confused when people remark that her shoes don't match.
This year, her Easter basket contained a maze. Caelyn picked her own starting point far from the end and made it correctly from it to the finish never once going near the beginning. My wife commented this describes our daughter perfectly.
Now going to kindergarten, her difference is obvious. She is the only one at school carrying a Ramones book bag rather than a backpack. While she does like Hello Kitty and princesses, her favorite shirts have Speed Racer, The Avengers, The Ramones, Green Day and Darth Vader on them.
She may be the only one in her school (certainly the only one in her grade) to see American Idiot on Broadway. Granted, that was my idea, but her excitement at the show was unbelievable. The second Billy Joe Armstrong entered the stage, she couldn't stop jumping up and down. She danced and sang along with the songs much to the delight of the people around us.
A couple of weeks after the show, Caelyn's Aunt Melina met Billy Joe Armstrong and mentioned to him her niece really enjoyed American Idiot. Caelyn was stunned and thrilled to find out the singer from Green Day knew she liked his show.
Caelyn loves to draw, paint, tell stories, put on shows and just about anything artistic and creative. She is always asking what this song means or what was meant when they sang this lyric. She also wants explanations for why characters in stories, movies and tv shows do the things they do.
Recently she started writing songs. Seriously. She started writing lyrics using a phonics based system of writing since she can't read very well yet. Either that or she tells the lyrics to me so I can write them for her. Many times she will then go over to the piano and bang out a rhythm for the lyrics. They are simple and short with a lot of repetition but they are clearly songs. The subjects are generally things going on at school or about God. Sometimes they are a take on a song she knows.
It is unlikely, however, she will ever be a sports star. She takes dance and Taekwon-do. She does well with them but put her in front of a soccer ball or a glove on her hand and while she will give it all she's got, not much has developed there. She has yet to ride a bike because she thinks peddling is too difficult.
Long before I ever considered having children, I jokingly remarked that if I ever did have a child I would raise it to be a boil on the ass of society. While I don't really want that, I don't want a typical child either and I never have.
Perhaps it is because I am not normal. My wife will be the first to tell you this. After ten plus years of marriage and being together years before that, she still is amazed at how I see and interpret the things around me. She often remarks how she forgets I don't think like normal people do. I take this as a compliment even when it is not meant to be.
There is a debate about nature vs nurture as to how a child will turn out. In the case of my daughter, it doesn't matter as I am a stay at home dad and she definitely has my nature.
This has me worried for Caelyn's teenage years though and even for what they now call the tween years. She is not typical and the world can be cruel to those who don't fit in their box. It starts early in life but really hits hard in high school.
While I had an abundance of friendly acquaintances in high school, people I had known since elementary school that I got along with, I only had a couple of truly close friends. I was blessed to have them in my life. I was also fortunate to have a wonderful girlfriend my senior year.
Those three, they know who they are, helped me in ways they never knew just by their mere presence in my life and even though I am not the best at keeping in touch, I still love them dearly. I hope and pray my daughter has the same good fortune I did and finds people like them.
She will have a tough time as she gets older and starts to realize she is different. Sadly, there will be plenty of her peers more than willing to point it out to her as well.
My wife and I will be there to support her and hopefully she will never lose her individuality. I hope and pray we instill in her the confidence to be herself no matter what. I hope she always stays that girl in the womb, kicking at those who try to get her to move when she is not ready. And I hope she has the will to fight and kick and claw to keep herself and never lose it to those that will try to stomp out that individuality which makes her so extraordinary. For she is just that, extraordinary.
At that age they are so full of potential and enthusiasm it is hard to call them average. Watch them closely and you can catch glimpses of who they could become. Their potential is almost limitless but you can see see their future demons in there also. It is an amazing age so average doesn't fit.
I hesitate to use the word normal. It's kind of a loaded word and it means different things to different people. So let's just say my daughter is not your typical 5 year old.
This is not surprising. She has always been a little different from kids her own age. There is just something in her personality.
I remember the ultrasound where we learned Caelyn was a girl. Her legs were tightly closed. The technician pushed at her from a variety of angles trying to get her to move. Each attempt was met with resistance. It took so long, I thought the technician would just give up. I was about ready to myself. It was then Caelyn finally moved. We saw this little foot on the monitor grow until it took up almost the entire screen. The technician jumped a little, then laughed. “She just kicked me,” she told us.
When Caelyn was too young to even crawl, she had a bout of colic. It was what I would call good colic, if there is such a thing. Rather than occurring at night, it would start around 4 pm. and end around 8 pm. It was frustrating but better than her screaming through the night.
One afternoon, after trying everything I could think of to calm her down, I just gave up. I went over to the computer and cranked The Distillers while I held Caelyn in my lap. For those who are not familiar with The Distillers, the simple description is they are a very noisy punk band. Upon hearing the music, Caelyn immediately calmed and fell asleep. It became our routine until the colic ended.
From before the age of two she loved The Ramones. For almost two years, it was the only thing she would listen to in the car without getting upset. At age three she asked me why they sounded different when I put on the Brain Drain CD. This was their first release after Dee Dee, their primary songwriter had left the band. Even at that early age, she noticed the slight change in musical style.
Her preferred shoe of choice, Converse Chuck Taylor High Tops. One pink, One purple. She has been wearing them that way for years and is genuinely confused when people remark that her shoes don't match.
This year, her Easter basket contained a maze. Caelyn picked her own starting point far from the end and made it correctly from it to the finish never once going near the beginning. My wife commented this describes our daughter perfectly.
Now going to kindergarten, her difference is obvious. She is the only one at school carrying a Ramones book bag rather than a backpack. While she does like Hello Kitty and princesses, her favorite shirts have Speed Racer, The Avengers, The Ramones, Green Day and Darth Vader on them.
She may be the only one in her school (certainly the only one in her grade) to see American Idiot on Broadway. Granted, that was my idea, but her excitement at the show was unbelievable. The second Billy Joe Armstrong entered the stage, she couldn't stop jumping up and down. She danced and sang along with the songs much to the delight of the people around us.
A couple of weeks after the show, Caelyn's Aunt Melina met Billy Joe Armstrong and mentioned to him her niece really enjoyed American Idiot. Caelyn was stunned and thrilled to find out the singer from Green Day knew she liked his show.
Caelyn loves to draw, paint, tell stories, put on shows and just about anything artistic and creative. She is always asking what this song means or what was meant when they sang this lyric. She also wants explanations for why characters in stories, movies and tv shows do the things they do.
Recently she started writing songs. Seriously. She started writing lyrics using a phonics based system of writing since she can't read very well yet. Either that or she tells the lyrics to me so I can write them for her. Many times she will then go over to the piano and bang out a rhythm for the lyrics. They are simple and short with a lot of repetition but they are clearly songs. The subjects are generally things going on at school or about God. Sometimes they are a take on a song she knows.
It is unlikely, however, she will ever be a sports star. She takes dance and Taekwon-do. She does well with them but put her in front of a soccer ball or a glove on her hand and while she will give it all she's got, not much has developed there. She has yet to ride a bike because she thinks peddling is too difficult.
Long before I ever considered having children, I jokingly remarked that if I ever did have a child I would raise it to be a boil on the ass of society. While I don't really want that, I don't want a typical child either and I never have.
Perhaps it is because I am not normal. My wife will be the first to tell you this. After ten plus years of marriage and being together years before that, she still is amazed at how I see and interpret the things around me. She often remarks how she forgets I don't think like normal people do. I take this as a compliment even when it is not meant to be.
There is a debate about nature vs nurture as to how a child will turn out. In the case of my daughter, it doesn't matter as I am a stay at home dad and she definitely has my nature.
This has me worried for Caelyn's teenage years though and even for what they now call the tween years. She is not typical and the world can be cruel to those who don't fit in their box. It starts early in life but really hits hard in high school.
While I had an abundance of friendly acquaintances in high school, people I had known since elementary school that I got along with, I only had a couple of truly close friends. I was blessed to have them in my life. I was also fortunate to have a wonderful girlfriend my senior year.
Those three, they know who they are, helped me in ways they never knew just by their mere presence in my life and even though I am not the best at keeping in touch, I still love them dearly. I hope and pray my daughter has the same good fortune I did and finds people like them.
She will have a tough time as she gets older and starts to realize she is different. Sadly, there will be plenty of her peers more than willing to point it out to her as well.
My wife and I will be there to support her and hopefully she will never lose her individuality. I hope and pray we instill in her the confidence to be herself no matter what. I hope she always stays that girl in the womb, kicking at those who try to get her to move when she is not ready. And I hope she has the will to fight and kick and claw to keep herself and never lose it to those that will try to stomp out that individuality which makes her so extraordinary. For she is just that, extraordinary.
Monday, June 13, 2011
Ramblings About The End of School and Summer
In less than two weeks our daughter will finish her first year of school. She will no longer be a kindergartner. She will be moving into the first grade.
Caelyn's kindergarten graduation is set for next Wednesday with the last day of school next Thursday. It's funny. Before I had a child in school, I found the idea of all the little graduation celebrations amusing. I didn't really see them as having much of a point. Not anymore. They are significant, at least for a kindergartner.
I hear the transition from kindergarten to first grade is one of the toughest. For the first time they have to sit in desks rather than around tables. The teaching styles are different and the work is harder. It may be only one grade difference but it is two different worlds.
As is often the case with time, this school year has seemed to both fly and crawl by simultaneously. It feels as if it were only yesterday I was holding Caelyn's hand, walking her to class on her first day of "real" school.
That day was hard on me. I was proud but sad. It was her first significant step into a bigger world that I would not always be a part of. There would be influences I would have no control over and friends I would barely know. It would be a world that was hers. Sure, I would be a part of it, but it would be hers and I would be the visitor.
Fortunately, that world has been a good one. She has been blessed with wonderful teachers and classmates. She has made some really good friends and has learned a lot.
Now with summer coming, the onus will be on me to make sure the relationships she has forged through this school year continue.
One of the saddest things it seems to me is to see the relationships built up over the course of a school year disappear, or at least go on hiatus, during the summer. I know from my own experience that is tough on a kid. You go from seeing your friends almost every day to not seeing them at all very abruptly.
It's no one's fault really. Time doesn't stop and the day to day activities of life keep coming so before you know it, summer is over and your kid hasn't seen their friends for two months. It happens to us adults all the time.
So there will need to be play dates. Hopefully, a lot of play dates. I need to make sure of that. There is also Caelyn's birthday at the beginning of August to plan. Hopefully, many of her classmates will be in town for that.
This monkey will need to do some dancing this summer to keep the kids entertained. And I hope to have my kids and their friends dancing along with me.
Caelyn's kindergarten graduation is set for next Wednesday with the last day of school next Thursday. It's funny. Before I had a child in school, I found the idea of all the little graduation celebrations amusing. I didn't really see them as having much of a point. Not anymore. They are significant, at least for a kindergartner.
I hear the transition from kindergarten to first grade is one of the toughest. For the first time they have to sit in desks rather than around tables. The teaching styles are different and the work is harder. It may be only one grade difference but it is two different worlds.
As is often the case with time, this school year has seemed to both fly and crawl by simultaneously. It feels as if it were only yesterday I was holding Caelyn's hand, walking her to class on her first day of "real" school.
That day was hard on me. I was proud but sad. It was her first significant step into a bigger world that I would not always be a part of. There would be influences I would have no control over and friends I would barely know. It would be a world that was hers. Sure, I would be a part of it, but it would be hers and I would be the visitor.
Fortunately, that world has been a good one. She has been blessed with wonderful teachers and classmates. She has made some really good friends and has learned a lot.
Now with summer coming, the onus will be on me to make sure the relationships she has forged through this school year continue.
One of the saddest things it seems to me is to see the relationships built up over the course of a school year disappear, or at least go on hiatus, during the summer. I know from my own experience that is tough on a kid. You go from seeing your friends almost every day to not seeing them at all very abruptly.
It's no one's fault really. Time doesn't stop and the day to day activities of life keep coming so before you know it, summer is over and your kid hasn't seen their friends for two months. It happens to us adults all the time.
So there will need to be play dates. Hopefully, a lot of play dates. I need to make sure of that. There is also Caelyn's birthday at the beginning of August to plan. Hopefully, many of her classmates will be in town for that.
This monkey will need to do some dancing this summer to keep the kids entertained. And I hope to have my kids and their friends dancing along with me.
Friday, June 3, 2011
Memorial Day Weekend Recap (or just an excuse to post a lot of pictures)
We had a busy Memorial Day weekend. It was one of those where you spend very little time at home. Here is a recap of the weekends events.
While technically not part of the holiday, the spring concert at Caelyn's school was held Thursday morning. Here is a video of her and the other kindergartner's performance. It has been broken into two parts.
Spring Concert Part 1
Spring Concert Part 2
Friday, brought the first day off from school. This is always tricky for me. The kids expect this monkey to dance so I took them to Turtleback Zoo. The place was just that, a zoo. I had never seen so many people there before. Fortunately, whoever organized the place did their job well so even as crowded as it was, things went smoothly.
Saturday took us to Governors Island and their kid's festival as part of their opening day celebration.
Monday, we met some friends and their daughter (a pre-school classmate of Caelyn's) and spent the day at Victorian Garden in Central Park. Caelyn made it onstage for two different shows. Video is at the end.
Video of Caelyn Onstage with King Henry
Video of Caelyn Onstage with Sammie and Tudie
It was a nice weekend, I wonder what this one will bring.
While technically not part of the holiday, the spring concert at Caelyn's school was held Thursday morning. Here is a video of her and the other kindergartner's performance. It has been broken into two parts.
Spring Concert Part 1
Spring Concert Part 2
Friday, brought the first day off from school. This is always tricky for me. The kids expect this monkey to dance so I took them to Turtleback Zoo. The place was just that, a zoo. I had never seen so many people there before. Fortunately, whoever organized the place did their job well so even as crowded as it was, things went smoothly.
Riding the Train
Riding the Carousel
Riding the Pony
Feeding the Parakeet at the Aviary
Saturday took us to Governors Island and their kid's festival as part of their opening day celebration.
Fun with Bubbles
More Fun with Bubbles
Roaming the Island with Maracas in Hand
Arts and Crafts
Osprey Flying by as Part of Fleet Week
Flowers
Say Cheese for Caelyn
Me and the Boy
Sunday we went to church and then a street fair on Lexington.
Three Girls, A Boy and a Piano
Monday, we met some friends and their daughter (a pre-school classmate of Caelyn's) and spent the day at Victorian Garden in Central Park. Caelyn made it onstage for two different shows. Video is at the end.
Victorian Gardens at Wollman Rink
Ready for the Ride to Start
This is More Like It
Watching Mommy as I Ride
Whack a Mole
I Could Totally Win This
Watching King Henry
Swings Are Fun
Driving the Truck
What's With All This Traffic
Finally, We're Moving
Lunch Time Antics
More Lunch Time Antics
Sit Still While We Eat, I Don't Think So
Hanging With King Henry
King Henry is Funny
Watching Sammie and Tudie
Sammie and Tudie
Tudie Reads a Story
I Need a Drink
Hanging with Sammie and Tudie
More Rides
Frogs Are Fun
I Love Rides
Video of Caelyn Onstage with Sammie and Tudie
It was a nice weekend, I wonder what this one will bring.
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